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Tuesday, June 25, 2013

Random Thoughts From The Road

1. The shoe shine guy in Terminal 3 South at Phoenix Sky Harbor air port is THE MAN! My boots have not been this shiny. Ever. 

2. I'm having a hard time figuring out why anyone would want a pair of the Google Glasses. Now the NSA can get a visual record of every woman's ass that some nerd has stared at. How long do you think it will be before some jealous girlfriend/wife figures out how to hack in and see what boyfriend/hubby is looking at. It can't end well. 

3. I had perhaps the second worst hamburger of my life today. First place goes to the one I had in a dinky little, hole in the wall take away place in Weymouth, England in 1999 or 2000. I'm pretty sure it was not real beef. Mad cow possibly. 

4. Both my meals today so far were less than stellar, and tasted....off. I hope my taste buds have not decided to revolt. 

5. Daddy Hawk's venerable ride of 13 years is making like it wants to fall apart again. 

6. 2 hours of flight time with wifi and Craigslist is probably not wise. 

7. I got upgraded to First Class for my flight home. It's not what it used to be, but it beats coach with an ugly stick. 

8. Warm nuts and a bourbon and coke make most things seem unimportant.

9. Dry heat is better than humid heat any day.

10. Got my review and bonus yesterday. Both were good.

11. Having the government take 32.65% out of my bonus for withholding...no bueno.

12. I don't want to think about what the .Gov is doing with my money. 

13. It's sad when airline food is the best meal of the day. 

14. I'm pretty sure Hoffa is buried in eastern Arizona. There is nothing out here. 

15. The boss strongly suggested I get to work an hour earlier which means I have to give up my mornings with M&M. Boo.

16. I want a newer car, but not a car payment.

17. I want another motorcycle.  The Queen is not opposed. 

18. Is a sling/messenger bag still a man purse if it holds a revolver and 50 rounds of ammo?

19. I wonder if arguing that a revolver is just a tool will get around the office's no weapons policy.

20. The guy behind me ordered scotch and ginger ale. Something about that seems vaguely criminal. 

21. Using a knock knock joke in your opening statement as the defense attorney in a murder trial is worse than rhyming "fit" and "acquit". Insulting the jury at the same time is a bonus.

22. The bourbon is gone. We must fix that. 

2 comments:

  1. #18 - it's urban camoflauge. Keep at it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. GunDiva, I can only go so far as a hipster. The sling bag I just ordered looks border line tacticool. I favor the slings over a backpack because it leaves both hands free and stays in place better.

      Delete

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