The Super Secret Special News

It’s official. I can finally discuss the super secret special news that has been in the works. Since I have a very smart and astute group of readers, I doubt this news will come as much of a surprise to you all. But, at least now I can pay off the hints I’ve been dropping here and there.

For the last month, I have been in the interview process for what turned out to be an extremely selective company. Today, I received and accepted what I can only describe as an incredible offer. I was selected over 25 other applicants that have been invited to go through the process since May. That should tell you a little about how seriously this company has taken the hiring process.

The process started for me a month ago when I received a call out of the blue from a recruiter I’ve talked to a couple of times over the years. He had seen my resume posted on an industry job posting website which had been posted several years ago when I was trying to get a job back in Dallas to be back with The Queen during the darkest days of the mystery illness. We chatted for a bit, and he asked how things were going. I brought him up to speed on my world, and he mentioned that he was working on something but that I sounded pretty comfortable where I was. I almost shot the job down out of hand when the recruiter mentioned a certain type of claims that are anathema to me being involved with the job. Fortunately, further discussion revealed that those certain claims were a relatively small part of the job.

Anyway, the more we talked, the more interesting the opportunity became. I agreed to have the recruiter submit my resume to the company. They got back with me almost immediately to schedule an interview for the following week. From there, things have been moving remarkably fast for this type of position.

There some odd yet interesting highlights to the process. One was the spelling test. This company has institutionalized a spelling test as part of the hiring process. Basically, it’s one sheet of paper with about a 100 words on it. You have to circle the misspelled words. Apparently, if you do not do well on that small task, you don’t get to the next phase. I was told that it is amazing how many “well qualified” people do not pass the test. I was also told that I scored a 98 which has me puzzling over which two words I missed.

The other was the psychological evaluation which I mentioned previously. After the initial interview, I had to complete a battery of online assessments before meeting with psychologist in person. The battery of tests was intense. It seriously felt like I was taking the GRE and LSAT all at once. The in person interview with the psychologist was easy by comparison.

Yesterday was the final interview; and, at the end of the interview, the VP of claims and the CEO of the company said they were definitely interested in my and would get back to me with an offer ASAP. The offer arrived via email this morning; and, after a series of phone calls, we were able to come to some very agreeable terms.

So, what will I be doing? My official title will be claim consultant which is the same title I currently work under; however, the two positions are worlds apart. At my current company, a claim consultant is a frontline claims adjuster who handles claims and nothing else. At the new company, a claim consultant is part claims adjuster, part home office oversight for third party administrators and part account manager. The new company is also much smaller than my current company which means flatter management (my boss will be the VP of claims who reports to the CEO), less bureaucracy, more responsibility, etc. After the past six years with a large (30,000+ employees), old company with a huge, distant, entrenched bureaucracy, being able to literally walk down the hall and talk with the CEO to get a decision is huge for me.

Did I mention I will get my own private office with a nice view?

There is a fairly heavy, nationwide travel requirement with the new position, and one of their conditions for offering the job was that they expected me to leave law school behind. That condition alone led to several late night discussions with The Queen. We ultimately decided that I would agree to leave law school if the job were offered for several reasons. First, law school and becoming a lawyer were never “The Dream”. At most, it was a means of moving forward to make The Dream possible. Second, the money involved with this job is good enough that we will be able to get out of debt much sooner than we would have otherwise (as opposed to going further into debt with student loans). If I hate the job or the people (both unlikely after the process I’ve been through), I can stomach it long enough to save some cash back to make going back to school less of a burden. Third, I really didn’t comprehend how difficult working full time and going to law school was going to be. It really was too much. I had too many late nights. Work was suffering, school work and study weren’t as good as they could have been, and I really wasn’t able to give everything to The Queen that she deserved. If I could go to school full time and do nothing else, that would be one thing. As it is, I could probably do it, but at what cost?

With the family rapidly expanding, the money was a major factor in the decision as well. The company said they wanted the very best people and compensates them accordingly. I will tell you that the money is well above average for the industry. To give you an idea, my salary was already above average for the company I’m with (and the industry for what I do) because I was allowed to keep my supervisor’s salary when I stepped down to move back home and take care of The Queen. The new company is offering a very nice pay increase (in the double digits by percentage) with a significant signing bonus which makes for a pretty big incentive to make a change.

I wish I could say that I have mixed feelings about the whole thing, but I really don’t. I’m too excited about the new position, the people I’ll be working with and what it means for The Queen and our growing little family to be anything but happy.

One Down, How Many To Go?

Well, as of 10:15 PM last night, my first semester of law school was done for better or worse. Now the wait for grades begins. Will he be allowed to take a second semester, or will he have his law school career tragically cut short by abysmal performances on the all or nothing finals? Stay tuned. Same Bat Channel. Same Bat Tim...er...whenever.

I have two words to say: KNOB CREEK.

Nine year old small batch bourbon in your backpack makes one very popular after an exam. Just sayin'

I never thought four hours would seem like too SHORT of a time for a final exam, but I and several others discovered that time is of no importance until it involves a law school final. I actually ran out of time on the Torts final and finished the criminal law final with only 15 minutes to spare. It felt more like 40 minutes instead of four hours it went by so fast.

Of the three classes they allowed us part timers to take, I feel the best about last night's final even though it was criminal law in which I have zero personal experience. As I told some of my class mates, I won't loose any points for not trying. I answered all the questions and made what I thought were solid efforts on both essay questions (one of which involved a jury instruction exercise for which I was out of town when it was covered in class).

The Torts final...well...who knew an open book, open outline test could be SO FRICKIN' hard? I answered all of the multiple choice questions and feel like I did fairly well there. I answered all but one of the nine short answer questions (the one I didn't answer should have been a full blown essay question). Unfortunately, I ran out of time during the dreaded essay question. It had a ton of issues to address, and I had spent way too much time in the short answer and MPC sections to cover it all. I had roughed in an outline, but I know I'm not getting full credit on that section.

c'est la vie

I really don't want to talk about my legal analysis, research and writing class.

In other news, the thing which I'm not discussing in detail yet should come to a final resolution sometime middle to late next week. I think. Gory details to follow when they become available.

Quick Update

I apologize for being a delinquent blogger here of late. It's been a busy several weeks here at Castle Erickson with work, school, studying and the false alarm foster child situation. Unfortunately, I think it's only going to get busier for the next couple of weeks. There is something afoot that I cannot discuss in detail yet; however, it involves a a pretty major potentially life changing decision. Discussions within the family about this issue have pretty much consumed the Thanksgiving holiday weekend. 

While I've been away, I seem to have attracted a few new followers. Several bloggers have a tradition of welcoming new followers to the fold so to speak which I think is admirable. I've tried to do that from time to time, but it has been a real long time and many followers ago since I did so. My intent has been to do another massive follower intro, and I even started working on it before law school started to get in the way. I'll try to get that finished here before the end of the year after finals are done and things stop being so crazy. 

In the mean time, I offer a heartfelt welcome to Warlock Sundance, Stephen, Duke, Modern Day Redneck, Hoss Boss and justcook. I appreciate you taking the time to follow me increasingly irregular postings. Hopefully, regular programming involving guns, law school, foster parenting and associated craziness will resume sometime in the near future. No promises. 

One last thing before I get back to studying for my "all or nothing" Torts final scheduled for tomorrow evening. I've been meaning to mention this for a while, but it keeps eluding my limited attention span. I had to spend the better part of a week working from the law library at school because AT&T managed to kill my DSL connection for an entire week. I noticed something during that time which had been poking around the edges of my consciousness. Despite the reputation attorneys have for being ruthless, unethical scavengers, law students are, at the same time, generous, helpful and entirely too trusting. The heartless and unethical part must come later. The scavenger part, however, is purely instinctual. 

Allow me to explain. I sat in the law library for over eight hours on at least two different days watching students leave laptops and books worth well over $1000 unattended (and the laptops unlocked) while they left to go get coffee, go to the bathroom or others for fifteen or even thirty minutes at a time. A dishonest person could have walked away with not only valuable stuff but a semester's worth of work had they been so inclined; however, I never once saw anyone so much as blink in the direction of someone else's stuff. Balance this with what appears to be the near universal and ravenous appetite of law students. Every group event or meeting at school involves free food. Not that I'm complaining. Usually it's pizza, but we've also had Chick-fil-a, In-And-Out Burgers, Pot Belly Sandwiches and others catered in. Any leftovers from these events are shamelessly scavenged by other students. If a student walks in and smells food, it's on like Donkey Kong. It's like chumming the waters for sharks.

Anyway, must go now. Back to studying.

Half Way To The End of The Beginning

As of tonight, I am half way through my first semester of law school. Here are some thoughts and observations so far.

1. I came across a news article posted on the wall in a hallway on campus discussing last year’s graduating class. According to the article, Texas Wesleyan graduated 68 law students last year. I don’t know how many people started with that class of graduates, but I do know my class started out with 225. If the enrollment rates have been consistent for the last several years which is likely, that translates to approximately a 70% attrition rate over the life of the program which is somewhat sobering to put it mildly. That figure doesn’t take into account how many either fail the bar exam or don’t even bother to take it. Why you would go all the way through law school and not take the bar exam is a mystery to me, but I know it happens.
2. There are two students with the first name “Babak”. For all I know that may be their ethnic version of “Bob” or “Jim”. Still, in Texas, that strikes me as an interesting coincidence.
3. I made a “B” on my first Legal Analysis, Research & Writing class memo. Considering the fact that I rushed it after having a major brain failure by erroneously thinking that I had an extra day to complete it leaving no time for proof reading or revision, I consider that a win.
4. The final memo is due Tuesday. I will be sweating bullets this weekend while chained to my laptop cranking out what I hope will be “A+” material.
5. If my vision survives all the reading, I will be surprised.
6. Practice exams are at the end of October in the Torts and Criminal law classes which will give us about a month before the real thing to have a pant wetting, hysterical, nervous breakdown. One test = 100% of your grade plus or minus 15% at the professor’s discretion based on class participation. No pressure.
7. I’ve been assured by several of my attorney business associates that it gets easier after this semester.
8. I really think they are just saying that to make me feel better.
9. I feel pretty confident that I have a reasonably good grasp on the concepts I need to know for my classes so far. At least, I haven’t had a “what the hell are you talking about” moment yet.
10. I could be completely delusional on that last point.
11. I had forgotten how much I hate commuting after working from home for several years now. I’ve been getting unpleasant reminders of why I hate commuting like freeways being shut down for construction at 10:00 at night which prevents me from getting home when I am already deliriously tired, hungry and need to study. Then there are the rush hour accidents that slow traffic to a crawl and make me late for class to the displeasure of my professor. Stupid gawkers.
12. You know you are wore out when sitting in a bell tower with high powered rifle starts to make perfect sense AND other students agree with you. 
13. Then you realize that you don't have time to consider acting on number 12. because your memo is due next Tuesday.
14. The Queen remains very supportive and loving. She is a saint.

More updates as events warrant.

Old Wisdom

"State interference is an evil, where it cannot be shown to be a good. Universal insurance, if desired, can be better and more cheaply accomplished by private enterprise. " Oliver Wendel Holmes, The Common Law.

Thought For The Day

To the sweet, young thing in my Torts class: I know you're young and you think you're sorta cute; but, please, for the love of all that is sacred: Don't wear hip huggers to class if you're going to forget to do a crack check after sitting down. Someone give me a penny or a spit wad or some plumbers putty...something...anything.  I'd go wash my eyes out now, but I'm pretty sure this is going to be a recurring event.

One Month Down

By the time you read this (since I’m drafting it in the middle of my Wednesday night Torts class…I know…bad student, no bonus points – never fear, I’m keeping up with my class notes in another screen), I will have completed my first month (4 weeks actually) of law school. I have this to say about that….

My brain is full.

Not really, but it feels that way.

I’m still not getting much sleep. For instance, I had great intentions of getting to sleep before midnight last night after getting home from class at about 10:30 PM. No such luck. It was 1:30 before I finally put head to pillow; and, even then, I don’t think I actually snored until 2:00 AM. Caffeine is helping keep me awake, but it has a price. Friday night to Saturday afternoon, I slept for 13 hours and probably could have slept for another couple of hours if it weren’t for the fact that The Queen was cooking brunch and I was hungry.

Sleep isn't the only thing I'm losing. Since I started school, I've dropped between 15 and 20 pounds. Before school, I fluctuated between 245 to 250. After four weeks, I'm down to 230. If I could be in shape and 230, I wouldn't complain too much (even though 210 is a better weight for me). However, the likelihood of exercise leading to me being in shape happening before the end of my law school career is between slim and none. 

My academic support class went through all the tasks an evening law student who works full time is supposed to accomplish in the number of hours available in any given week. For those who are interested, there are 168 hours available to us in any 7 day period. Try as we might to get a few more hours squeezed in here or there, that’s the ball game. Now, take away 40 hours for work, 49 hours for sleep (if you are generous and give yourself 7 hours a night), 12 hours actually at the school, and 33 hours for study (if you devote the recommended 3 hours of study per classroom hour). Just for these tasks alone you’re at 134 hours out of your week not including going to the bathroom, taking showers, eating, grocery shopping, commuting, etc. If you are really lucky, you are left with about 15 hours a week to spend relaxing, spending time with family, vegetating, etc.

I didn’t write about this last week because there was no time; however, I had an interesting discussion with my Torts professor after class last week. During her lecture, she made a brief comment that she was scared of guns (the case we were discussing had something to do with firearms). After class, I approached her to find out where she was coming from on the subject. She said that she was uncomfortable with the whole idea of an object that can kill you. Despite that, she does not take the position that all guns should be banned. She thinks the ownership of guns should be heavily regulated, but she is okay with the use of guns for self defense and hunting. Interestingly, she did not think target shooting was a valid use for firearms. I discussed firearm safety, crime rates, etc. She seemed to be open to the thought that a firearm in the hands of a properly trained owner is no danger to anyone when the Four Rules are followed. It was an interesting and cordial discussion.

In other news, one of my colleagues has decided to throw in the towel. It hit pretty close to home because it was one of the members of my Criminal Law class study group. I was expecting the herd to be thinned out a little as time moved on due to grades, life and other inconveniences. However, I was not expecting it to occur this soon. This particular student sent me and the other members of the group an email on Tuesday just before class. It came as a total surprise to all of us. He seemed to be getting the material and hadn’t voiced any reservations to us about his continuing with school. His email didn’t elaborate on his reasons other than to suggest that he had been doing some soul searching. I can respect that, and I wished him well. I do feel sorry for him on one thing. He missed the deadline to get a full refund on tuition. So, it’s an expensive decision if nothing else.

I also have my first major assignment due next week in my Legal Analysis, Research and Writing class. In a way, I feel like I am back in high school English class: write a memo not to exceed 5 pages, double spaced….yada, yada, blah, blah, blah. That will be my life this weekend (in addition to tiling the pantry and laundry room). Fortunately, the research part of the assignment has been provided to us so that we can spend our time on our analysis and writing. Adding the research into the equation comes later. Fun times in the library coming my way.

Speaking of the library, one of my early assignments involved searching through case law reporters in the library for specific information. Reporters are bound volumes of court rulings on individual cases. For instance, the reporter for the appellate courts in Texas is called the Southwestern Reporter. There are currently 3 series of volumes going back into the 1800s. Each series contains volumes numbered from 1 to 999 (except for the current 3RD series which is still developing). In the library, these volumes are all grouped together by series in numerical order. So, 2ND series volume 665 comes after volume 664 and before volume 666, etc. During this library assignment, I was amazed to discover that allegedly intelligent post graduate students in law CAN’T COUNT. Twice, I found volumes of a particular reporter shelved out of numerical order. It really annoyed me because the volume I needed for my assignment was one of the ones mis-shelved necessitating a search to hunt down where it WAS shelved. I can’t even give the errant shelver the benefit of a dyslexia exception because the volume placed where the one I needed had no numerical connection to the two it was between. I can’t remember exactly, but it was like having volume 285 between volumes 697 and 699.

Another little library incident was the part of the assignment which found the book I needed in a section of the library that was on the border of the area under remodeling. Plastic sheeting to protect the books from dust was taped to the floor and the bookshelf right where I needed to be to get the book I needed to answer a particular question. It’s a good thing I have long arms, but I hope they don’t notice the size 11 tear on the plastic.

Finally, I haven’t mentioned the adoption process in a while. The Queen and I have completed our required classes. The Queen has had her one on one in person interview. Mine is scheduled for this Friday. After that, we have the home inspection where they tell us what we need to do we get the house ready for kids. Then, if I understand this correctly, we will be licensed foster parents on the list to have kids placed with us. We are cautiously excited.

That’s all for now. If you need me, I’ll be the unconscious one under the pillows.

Law School Wisdom

I thought I'd take a moment at the end of a very long day to impart a little wisdom from class earlier this evening (actually yesterday at this point).

"You have two ears and one mouth: use them in that proportion." - Anonymous

Or, for those of us who are mathmagically challenged, talk half as much as you listen.

If you need it simpler than that, I can't help you. You were probably too busy talking to listen anyway.

This Week In Review

Well, the first week of law school is in the books. In more ways than one. I apologize in advance for being generally brain dead, incoherent, and otherwise pre-occupied. It’s to be expected I suppose. I am keeping up with my blog reading. Writing and commenting are suffering for what I presume are obvious reasons. So, under the Spider Robison “Callahan’s” theory that shared pain is lessened and shared joy is increased, I thought I’d take this opportunity to share some observations and thoughts from the past week or so.

The total enrollment for my incoming class (we are informally referred to as “1L” meaning first year law students) including day and evening students is about 225 people. There are 70 of us in the part time evening program. As the dean pointed out in all seriousness during orientation, 90% of us won’t be in the top 10%. Really? I didn’t know that. Thank you, Mr. Obvious. All mocking aside, my goal actually is to make the top 10% which I think is a reasonable and attainable goal given my experience and background.

Another observation from the first day of class, was the responses from the “ice breaker intros” during my “lock step” Torts class (lock step just means that everyone does the same classes in their first year). We have a group of folks with a fairly diverse set of backgrounds including 4 or 5 claims adjusters, 4 or 5 police officers, some law firm employees, a couple of engineers, a genuine research scientist, a stay at home mom or two, some fresh out of undergrad folks with a mix of “other”. There was one snark meister who claimed to be a “stay at home son.”

What surprised me most from the icebreakers was not the diversity of the backgrounds, but the high number of folks who admitted to having no idea what they planned to do with their law degree. At least a dozen people in the class of 70 have gone through the hassle to apply for law school and committed themselves to a four year total cost in excess of $80,000 with no plan of what they want to do once they are turned loose on the world. I’m sure some of those people are still discovering what area of law will be a good fit for them, but it was painfully obvious that a couple of them chose law school as a means of continuing to avoid the “real world”. Then there was the one guy who said he wants to be a lawyer so he can fight his speeding tickets. I really can’t argue with that. At least he has a plan.

Hitting the books takes on a whole new meaning in law school. Hitting the wallet is more like it. The 7 or 8 books required for my three classes cost $620. None of these would be considered light reading.

Reading is a major component of my life for the next 3 months or so. Analyzing what we read and writing about it is the other component. It has been suggested that we will need to read everything at least twice to successfully “get it.” There is a strong hint that three times might be better.

I really enjoyed the first case we read for the Criminal Law class. It was an appellate decision of a British criminal case from the 1800s. Three British seamen found themselves in the unfortunate situation of having to abandon ship into a life boat 1000 miles from the nearest land with limited provisions. Many days transpired with no land or ship in site. Provisions were consumed, and starvation ensued. One of the poor, unfortunate souls happened to be a young lad of 17 or 18 who was in worse shape than the other two. The two older, stronger survivors suggested that the boy should sacrifice himself so that the others could live. The boy, as you might imagine, was not a fan of this plan. Eventually, the boy went to sleep at which time one of the older men made sure that he did not wake up. Finger sandwiches and Bloody Maries were on the menu for the next few days until the remaining two were picked up by a passing ship four days after the Jeffrey Dahmer Memorial Banquet began. They were, of course, arrested and tried for murder. The appeal was about whether or not their actions were in accordance with naval tradition which held that cannibalism was acceptable in extreme, dire circumstances if the process of selecting the meals on wheels was fair, impartial and consented to by all.

Remind me not to go sailing with any Brits.

Sleep is a thing of the past. I don’t think I’ve been to sleep before 1:00 AM since school started. Might not happen tonight. We shall see.

I would like to know which janitorial genius thought it’d be a great idea to close off the main restrooms on the second floor for cleaning at the exact time that a 1L lock step class of 70 people not including other upper level classes were letting out for the evening.

I’ve already had two assignments due…both of which I successfully turned in on time. I’ve completed two other assignments not due until next week early. So, hopefully I can keep up with that at least.

Two of my classes will have 100% of the grade based on a single, final exam at the end of the semester. No pressure.

It’s late. I’m way too tired, and the bags under my eyes are getting heavier. So, that’s all for now. Good night. I’ll try to write when I find work. Posting will be erratic at best until I find a rhythm that works.

Miscellaneous Round Up

Good morning all you happy people. I thought I’d take a few minutes to give you a random update since I don’t have time to delve deeply into the burning hot topics awaiting escape from my feeble brain.

First, I found out that the end of my life as I know it begins on Monday, August 15. That’s when classes for law school starts. The school automatically registers me for classes and puts me in a writing section, etc. since the first year law curriculum is the same for everyone. Now I just have to figure out how I’m going to pay for this. I owe, I owe…it’s off to work I go.

I went in for a second opinion on the amazing stink eye on Wednesday. This eye doc happened to be the one who performed cataract surgery on a family member and got the eyesight back to 20/20 from “Is that stoplight red or green?” He took one look and said I had a case of “severe” iritis. According to him, the iris is adhering to the lens in 5 places. At least it was. Thursday night I noticed that the pupil in the right eye now looks like a flat tire. At the follow up appointment with him on Friday, he said that’s a good sign as it means there’s only one adhesion left. Whatever. My vision is still blurry out of the right eye.

A week ago Thursday, The Queen and I made a road trip to Tulsa, Oklahoma for business. We drove up Wednesday night and spent the night. If anyone of you reading this actually lives in the state, would you please do me a favor and find the head of your fair state’s transportation department and whollop him upside the head with a 2 x 4?

Seriously. It seems like every freaking road between Dallas and Tulsa was under construction. The interchange from US 69 to Indian Nation Turnpike. Closed. After detouring through scenic, downtown McAlester to the other entrance to INT, it was shut down because an 18 wheeler overturned. Coming into Tulsa, ALL (and I do mean ALL) the highways in the area of downtown we needed to go to were closed effectively destroying the directions we had to get to our hotel.

The kicker was our return trip though. We stopped for dinner at Western Sizzlin in McAlester since our options were extremely limited. After dinner, I went to the rest room before we got back onto the road. I really should have gotten a picture of this restroom. It would have fit right in at a high end steakhouse. There were armchairs and a bench and everything. Anywizz, after finishing business and while washing my hands, two young female employees walked in without announcing themselves. I just stared at them, and one of them said “Oh, sorry.” while the other one continued to babble incessantly about whatever it was they were talking about when they came in. When I came out, The Queen and I exchanged WTH? looks and gestures while I walked back to the table. She told me once we got back in the car that she now knows how I feel when she’s around other me. She said she felt very possessive, jealous, and “just what are those girls doing going near my man”, etc. I’m so proud.

Last, but not least, is a little scene from Friday night. The Queen, Nephew Ginger Boy and I were walking in downtown Fort Worth. In Sundance Square across from 8.0, we saw a short, thin woman “pole dancing” with a parking meter. She apparently had not a care in the world. Made me wish we had the camera with us.

At Long Last...

I present the following without further comment as I just don't have the words at the moment:

Status
	Term:	Fall	Year:	2011
	Program Time:	P/T Evening	Degree:	JD
	Current Status:		Decision Rendered
	Current Status Date:		5/17/2011
	Decision Status:		Admit
	Decision Status Date:		5/17/2011

Pardon Me While I Hyperventilate

I've been checking the Texas Wesleyan application status website every couple of hours...still nothing. I finally called just after five, and lo and behold I spoke to the person who is the hold up. At least, she claimed it was awaiting action on her part. I advised her that I'm not too proud to beg; and, when I found out she was the one who was the last person in line before getting the decision out, I asked her if she was susceptible to bribery. She stated that she is officially not open to bribery but did ask what I had to offer. She did promise to keep my file open on her desk and place her vote this evening so that the decision would go out this evening or first thing in the morning. We shall see.

And The Beating Continues...

If it weren't for the fact that Blogger was completely toast until a few minutes ago, I would have posted this last night. I called Texas Wesleyan again yesterday since there is still no word on the whereabouts on their decision regarding my application. I was again told that the admissions cycle for new students does, in fact, end today. I was also informed that decisions were being pushed out last night. At least, the first batch of decisions. Apparently, they had so many applications that they had to split it up into more than one batch. I was advised that if I didn't receive a decision by today, that it would definitely be sometime next week. Where have we heard that before?

When I asked how many applications they had received, I was told that they had received about 2000. I have no idea if this is normal or not, but I do think it should have been possible to get a decision out on mine sooner than 7 weeks. It's not rocket science. It's simple really. 35 business days. You only have to look at 57 a day which is about 7 an hour. Some applications don't take that long to read because they are clearly not law school material. The crayon gives them away. Those with perfect LSAT scores are probably quick reads too.

I can see them spending a little more time on my application. My resume was a whopping two pages long. I had four, one page letters of recommendation, the explanation about my academic probation, my personal statement, school transcripts and the application itself: 20 pages of material total. If that much. Seriously, how long does it take to read 20 pages? Especially when you really only need to carefully read about 5 or 6 pages of that. You'd think it's Dostoyevsky the way they've been dragging things out.

Oh well. I'll continue to sit here patiently fuming in my own distracted misery. Don't mind me. It's good training for our upcoming Obamacare wait times.

The Ultra Special Hell Continues

Today is Cinco de Mayo. I could not care less. 

Osama Bin Laden got put down for his eternal dirt nap a couple of days ago. So what?

My law school application still being in limbo...that's about all I can think about right now. 

Since I am neither a child molester or someone who speaks in the theater, I had to come up with another level of Hell for those who law school applications remain in limbo. Since today is 6 weeks to the day from when my application was marked complete, we are now moving into Ultra Special Hell Overtime. 

I did call again this morning to see if there was any more news to be had regarding the whereabouts of their decision regarding my fate. I spoke to a different person this time who again told me that the secret squirrel website had the most up to date information available regarding the status of my application. He did advise that "application under review" means that my application remains checked out by the admissions committee. He also let me know that there will definitely be a decision issued by the end of next week as that will be the end of this admissions cycle. 

So, to recap:

• No decision yet
• Decision promised by the end of next week
• Ultra Special Hell

More updates as events warrant. 

My Patience Wore Out

Okay, I think I finally reached the end of my patience. I called the number provided on the secret squirrel application website to see if I could get anymore detailed information regarding what is happening with my law school application. I was told that the committee is actively reviewing it, and they are having meetings over the next couple of days. I was told that a decision was likely sometime early next week.

We shall see. If there's no decision by Thursday, I'm sending in the rescue team to free my application from whatever bureaucratic log jam has captured it.

In other news, Brigid posted a fun piece that I've spotted on a couple of other blogs recently about the world's shortest letters. She solicited contributions. I had a sudden snark attack and commented with:

"Dear President Obama,

Please go screw Michelle for a change.

Sincerely,

The American Taxpayer"

 I couldn't help myself. Really.

As If I Didn't Have Enough To Worry About...

It's the end of week 5, no change in status with respect to the law school application whatsoever, but there is a new wrinkle in last week's case of mistaken identity. 

Apparently, I am now a fugitive from justice. You see, today, I received an undated letter from the Houston Police Department's Hit and Run Detail. The letter was postmarked on April 26, 2011, and requests, nay - COMMANDS, that I appear in Houston on Monday, May 2. That would be next Monday for the calendarly challenged among us. 

The best bit is this:

Failure to comply with this notice may cause you future inconvenience from this office. Your vehicle may be listed as WANTED on the HPD computer, and if stopped, the driver in some cases may be arrested. [emphasis theirs]

It's times like these that I really wish I was smart enough to figure out how to cut and paste or insert a .pdf document into blogger for proof because, really, I just can't make this stuff up. I especially like the "future inconvenience" part. Like forcing someone whose registered address is four hours away to come to Houston at 8:00 in the morning isn't inconvenience enough. On the other hand, at the rate I drive anymore it could be decades before I get future inconvenience. 

So, anyway, in an effort to avoid appearing on the most wanted list for Harris County or something equally stupid, I've sent off a fax to the investigating officer. The same officer who keeps office hours from 6:00 AM to 2:00 PM. I tried calling him first, but the mail man didn't get here until just after 3:00 PM today. So sorry. Try again tomorrow.

I thought I exhibited tremendous restraint when I sent the officer the following:

Please be advised that I received your undated letter regarding the subject case number today and attempted to call; however, I was informed you had already left for the day. Your letter was post marked April 26, 2011. The letter, copy following, alleges that I or my vehicle was involved in a traffic accident on April 20, 2011 in the 6800 block of Katy Freeway. The letter also demands that I appear in the offices of the Houston Police Department on Monday, May 2 at 8:00 AM.
  First, I am unable to appear in Houston on Monday, May 2 at 8:00 AM as I live four hours away, and one business day does not give me sufficient time to make the necessary arrangements to take off work and drive to Houston and back.
  Second, and more importantly, neither I nor my vehicle were even in Houston on April 20, 2011 much less involved in an accident. My vehicle is a white, 2000 Nissan Maxima with license plate number ###@G@. On April 21, 2011, I spoke with [the nice adjuster] at [decent company] Insurance (phone number 800-Car-Dent ext. Claim / claim number #########) who is the adjuster for the insurance company of one of the other driver's involved. Ms. [nice adjuster] confirmed that her driver had inadvertently written down the incorrect license plate number and the correct number should be ###@C@. It is my understanding that Ms. [nice adjuster] or someone from [decent company] will be sending a letter to the Houston Police Department confirming this information.

So, please go back and reread my advice on what to do in an accident. You might just save someone else, namely ME, some hassle. 

Thank you for your consideration.

Anytime Now

Well, dear readers, my anxiety levels have now officially kicked into high gear. I have reached new levels of distraction that I didn't think were possible, and there is no sign of this changing in the near future. Today is officially four weeks since my law school application status was changed to "now undergoing a comprehensive review". A process they say "typically takes 4 to 6 weeks."

Obviously, any hope of an early decision has been mercilessly crushed by the process taking NO LESS than four weeks. I really hope they don't plan on taking the full six weeks or more. I don't know that I can handle another two weeks of uncertainty. I have absolutely nothing with which to compare this experience. I suppose it is analogous to being an expectant parent; but, as The Queen and I are childless, I cannot say that for sure.

Meanwhile, the wait continues....

Week 3

As of today, Texas Wesleyan has had my law school application for three full weeks. No decision yet.

On the one hand, I really appreciate the ability to check the status of the application online. Daily. I've cut back from several times a day. On the other hand, I amused at their sense of humor. Take for instance the following sentence which I noticed today for the first time:

The process typically takes 4 to 6 weeks, but we invite your patience. (emphasis mine)

Invite my patience to go where and do what exactly? Is my patience being invited to apply for law school as well? I've heard of trying ones patience, but I never thought patience would be the attorney.

I was going to try uploading a clip from The Mummy where Rachel Weisz says "Patience is a virtue." and Brendan Fraser retorts "Not right now it isn't.", but I couldn't find one on YouTube in under five minutes. Go rent a copy, fast forward to that scene and consider it uploaded here. Thanks for the help. TTFN.

Progress

"Thank you for your application to Texas Wesleyan School of Law!
Our records indicate that your application is now undergoing a comprehensive review so that we can reach a final decision on your application."

I would have thought the comprehensive review would have begun two and a half weeks ago when I submitted the application, but it would appear that I think wrong. Oh well. Any progress is good progress at this point. They still haven't said "no" yet.

[Crickets]

Well, week two is dead and gone, and no word from the hostage takers about the status of my law school application.

Sorry for the lack of non-law school application related content this week. Work has been a disaster (die, computer, die), and I have been sleeping not nearly enough. Regular programming will resume once I find my head and screw it back on.