New Venture

Well, it's been an interesting week so far.

It started off a week ago today. Mid afternoon, I get a meeting invite from the boss' boss entitled "Discussion". Just me and him. Set for 9:00 AM Friday. Location: the HR conference room. Insert ominous music here. Whichever one floats your boat. The JAWS theme works for me.

I accepted the invite (like I had much of a choice) and went in search of the boss. I asked the boss lady if she has any clue what the meeting is about. She professed blissful ignorance of any meeting or the reasons for same. In hindsight, I think she should be nominated for an acting award, because there is no way she could not have known what was coming next. But, I'm getting ahead of myself.

I start to freak out a little. I've seen this movie before, and it doesn't end well for our hero.

I corner the boss lady's boss at the end the day and innocently inquire if, perhaps, I should prepare anything for our morning meeting and if he might share the topic of said meeting. He somewhat mournfully declined to offer any clues.

Now, our hero, yours truly, has been hard at work, flogging the other wage slaves to achieve impossible results. How impossible you ask? The year 2015 ended with our hard working claims adjusters blowing the legal expense budget by a significant percentage (13% if memory serves me correctly which translates into 6 figures worth of excess money flying out the door). Hard questions were asked. I analyzed the data, explained the facts of life in the heartless world of litigation and pleaded for a larger budget for 2016. My efforts were rewarded with small DECREASE in budget.

You have got to be kidding me.

To make matters worse, we get all new senior management a month into the year. Everyone is immediately on the alert as heads start rolling. Interestingly, senior management ignores my area for about 9 months. That's 9 months without any real direction or leadership from on high about what's expected. The only direction I was given was: 1) be in the files, 2) focus on early resolution, and 3) keep a close eye on the legal budget. The self same legal budget that had been cut from 2015.

Okay, let me just pull out my Mister Wizard instant miracle hat.

Through some magical confluence of of coincidences, my team manages to bring in legal expense under budget by 2.5%. That's a 15% improvement over 2015. Hip, hip, hurray. The crowd goes wild. Cheering was heard. There might have even been confetti.

Sorry. I have digressed. So, I spend all Thursday night trying to figure out why I must report to the HR conference room Friday morning. I haven't made any advances to anyone at the office (for The Queen is a jealous Queen, and I like skin attached to my body). I don't tell dirty jokes at the office. I don't do anything to run afoul of company rules and regs. Performance numbers look good. That leaves only a couple of possibilities.

Any puzzlement, I roll into the HR conference room at 9:00 AM to find boss lady's boss in the room with the home office HR person on video conference. The first words out of my mouth are: "This can't be good."

Sure enough, the net result is: "position eliminated". Nothing to do with performance, thank you for your efforts, strictly an organizational realignment, here's what we plan to do for you for severance, blah, blah, meaningless blah.

Long time readers will recall this has happened before. No, it's not any easier the second time around. I will say I am handling it better this time though. I made it to the car before I started having my own private meltdown.

That lasted for about 2 hours. During that time, I got the shock and hurt out of my system. I tried hard listen to what God was telling me. It was then that I came to the realization that the time had come to move forward with the plans that The Queen and I had been discussing for about 6 months.

Ever since we went to The Bahamas last year, we've been talking about what we can do to achieve a little more freedom to raise M&M together instead of me always having to disappear for 10+ hours a day to a commute and office. There are things we want to do together as a family, and 3 weeks of paid time off a year don't always cut it. Answer: start my own home based business.

So, effective today, I have an LLC registered with the state, a EIN with the IRS, a website, and I'm developing marketing materials and other essentials. Those of you who know me in real life will have seen the announcement on my personal FaceBook page. Details are unimportant as far as this post is concerned. Basically, it's me providing specific services relating to litigated claims. In the interest of professionalism, I won't be using this blog to plug the new business.

I already have a helper too.

He can't type worth a flip, and he generally just hangs around, sleeps, eats and leaves messes for me to clean up. But, he works cheap and keeps my neck warm.

Potty Humor

No, not the kind you think. Get your mind out of the toilet.

About a week or two ago, this sign...

...appeared in the toilet stalls in the men's room at my office. I have no idea why this sign appeared as it would never occur to me to put a paper towel in the toilet; but, be that as it may, said sign was apparently posted in all seriousness.

Well, someone (I have it on good authority who said person is), decided that the above sign could not go unchallenged. Thus, this sign...

...appeared a couple of days or three ago.

Well, apparently, the response was so popular that its creator was emboldened to add an addenda to the list which presaged the appearance of this sign...

Somebody needs a hobby, but I can't wait for the next installment.

The New Office View

The new office digs lookout to the north over the suburb where I grew up. Though not in this photo, I can actually see my old neighborhood from my office window.

This was taken at 7:47 AM this morning facing north. The relatively few cars heading north made my commute a surprisingly short 38 minutes this morning driveway to parking garage which beat MapQuest's estimate by three or four minutes.

I don't feel sorry for all those poor schlubs heading south either. Not one bit. Mainly because I will be one of those poor schlubs heading south this evening.

Game Over

As the perceptive ones among you may have already noticed, my challenge to myself to post something everyday this month crashed and burned in a steaming pile of fail over the weekend. I would say that it all started when I fell asleep in the new patio furniture Friday night after the judicious application of a slice of Cheesecake Factory Godiva chocolate cheesecake, but that's not entirely true. 

The simple matter of fact is that I just couldn't kick start my give a flip to write anything over the weekend. So, having failed my self imposed test, it is back to my irregularly scheduled programming. 

In other news, I got to see my new office today for the first time since they finished installing the furniture. Allow me to back up just a second. In my entire 20 something year career in the insurance industry, I have thus far managed to escape the dreaded office move. My first job, the owners of the company owned the building and weren't going anywhere. My second job had just finished an office move about a year before I came on board. The third company did a move about a year after I left. The last company before this one just opted to let everyone go work from home. 

So, I arrive at a company that has been in the same office space for 25 years. One thing and another (you know...like increased crime, one of the male employees being propositioned by a prostitute in the parking garage, the building going through a major remodel, etc.), and it was time to move. 

All things considered including the horror stories I've heard of office moves, things have been going remarkably smoothly in the run up to the move. We officially open for business in the new space on September 3, but I've had several opportunities to go up to the new space while it's been under construction. It's been fascinating to me to watch the transformation. 

So, without further adieu, here's what my new digs look like:

The new desk will have three monitors and electically operated sit/stand options with memory presets. 

Strictly speaking, it's not a corner office, but I do have a little bit of a side view to work with looking east. My main view looks north. In fact, I can see the neighborhood I grew up in from my office window. 

The new space is close to the same size as my current office, but it feels much bigger thanks to a better layout of the furniture. 

There are a couple of minor downsides to the new office. 1) it's six miles further north than the current office which means another 15 minutes or so in traffic both ways depending on what day of the week it is. 2) it's very close to the reception area and the main conference room as well as being the main route for most of the company big wigs to get to the CEO's office meaning my anonymous nose picking days are over. 

Overall, I'm still happy. The lunch time restaurant selection is greatly improved. We plan on selling Castle Erickson and finding something a bit closer to the new office (considering we are on the south side of the DFW metroplex with downtown in between us and the office). If the economy will allow us to sell. 

Know anybody looking to buy a 2200 square foot house on one acre with a 100 square foot shop in southern DFW? Let me know. 

Kinda Cool...Things You Don't See Everyday

The building where my office is located is undergoing renovation (just in time for our company to move offices in September). For the last week or two, they have been working on the roof which has required the use of a crane to lift materials (it's a 19 story building). It's been fascinating to watch (at least to me). So, I thought I would share some pictures.

A view from the parking garage. This is identical to the crane used in Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines.

I had no idea that the boom on these things extended that far up...

.... No. THAT far up.

A view from the 16TH floor. Ignore the reflections of the Hershey's chocolates. They are but ghosts of things that no longer exist.



That boom was swaying in the breeze. Watching it move from this perspective is dizzying. It looks like it's going to topple over any minute.

This was the best shot I could get of the top of the boom going over the edge of the roof. I think it's safe to say it was near the limit of it's reach.

The Wait Continues

I just thought I'd give everyone a quick update on the progress of the law school application. I received a polite email from Texas Wesleyan with a log in ID and password to monitor the status of my application which I promptly used. At the time I put in my application, LSAC had not yet sent in my credentials report as they were waiting on a couple of my recommendation letters to come in. Those came in this week, and I checked the TW site for any updates. Nothing. They are still saying my application is incomplete, but they do provide a contact person and phone number to call with any questions. Which I tried calling. Only to find out that this week is Spring Break, and the school is closed.

Grumble. Curse. Glare.

So, I'm sure they will get right on my application when they get back to the office next week.

Or they'll be hearing from a very impatient prospective student. Technology has made us an impatient lot don't you think?

In other news, since my days as a work from home wage slave are numbered, I thought I'd take a minute to reflect on some of the fringe benefits that I will miss once I pass the bar and start fighting the good fight.

1) Everday being business casual.

2) Bathrobes and slippers being considered business casual.

3) Netflix.

4) My office romance doesn't involve a co-worker and is heartily encouraged by my spouse.

5) My boss being 900 miles away.

6) Knowing exactly who ate my pint of Ben & Jerry's New York Super Fudge Chunk in the freezer.

7) My office mates wearing fur coats and not having opposable thumbs.

8) Guns and ammunition within easy reach of my desk.

9) My commute lasting less than one minute and burns no fossil fuels (unless you consider flatulence from a 41 year old to be a fossil fuel).

10) Conference calls being taken in the backyard with a pitching wedge and a headset.

11) No one complaining if I take off my shoes and walk around barefoot.

12) If I want to take a nap during my lunch hour, doing so in the comfort of my own bed.

13) Shaving being optional.

14) Having the music cranked as loud as I want.

15) No thermostat wars.

16) My office being a mess and no one caring...okay, no one but The Queen caring.

17) Fur therapy anytime I want it...and sometimes that I don't.

18) Not worrying about catching the office illness de jour.

19) Cleaning my guns at work not causing a panic.

Special Just For GunDiva

Hair of the dog that bite you. Mind you, those are 12" x 12" tiles.

The hair of the dog that bit you, and the dog that bit you.

Who says a spayed dog can't give birth?

GunDiva....you are SO welcome. 

The View From My Office Chair

The Queen and I are animal lovers. We often tell people that we have 2 cats and 2 1/2 dogs which frequently puzzles them. I work from home, and I took a moment to look away from the computer. This is the view that greated my eyes. Here, for your viewing pleasure, is a photo of the 1/2 dog. The reason we say we have 2 1/2 dogs is that custody/ownership of this mutt, sprawled in all his glorious wonder, is more or less shared between the Queen and I and her parents.

Enjoy.