Anyone out there amongst the readership who lives in or around the Jacksonville, FL area?
It appears that I will be coming into that fair city sometime in the next 7 to 10 days. The Queen and I are discussing making it into a little long weekend getaway. Perhaps there is a willing native who would be kind enough to give us the nickel tour?
Saturday, February 7, 2015
Sunday, February 1, 2015
Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap
With my apologies to AC/DC.
Still bupkis on the permanent job search front. The last rejection email is making my eye twitch a little. So, I thought I would endeavor to jump start my entrepreneurial spirit a little with a price list for services I am willing to render. All services provided in the greater Dallas/Fort Worth metroplex. Other locations negotiable subject to travel and mileage fees.
Babysitting - $50 per hour per child (you supply the duct tape)
Concrete Shoes - $100 per pair ($150 for lace up)
Divorce Settlement Mediation - $500 (double if children are involved)
Dog Shaming - $10 ($15 for large breeds)
Malicious Yenta - free of charge with a $100 retraction fee
Matchmaking - $50 per couple (double for nerds)
Neckties - $10 Windsor / $20 Bowtie
Political Campaign Manager - $1000 per hour plus travel expenses
Political Campaign Promise Writer - $100 per promise
Political Campaign Promise Enforcer - cost plus 10%
Toilet cleaning - $25 each ($50 for failure to courtesy flush and bad aim)
Wake Up Calls - $5 each 5:00 AM Central and later ($5 each additional minute before 5:00AM)
Yenta - $5 plus unlimited hot tea
Additional services subject to negotiation and availability
Still bupkis on the permanent job search front. The last rejection email is making my eye twitch a little. So, I thought I would endeavor to jump start my entrepreneurial spirit a little with a price list for services I am willing to render. All services provided in the greater Dallas/Fort Worth metroplex. Other locations negotiable subject to travel and mileage fees.
Babysitting - $50 per hour per child (you supply the duct tape)
Concrete Shoes - $100 per pair ($150 for lace up)
Divorce Settlement Mediation - $500 (double if children are involved)
Dog Shaming - $10 ($15 for large breeds)
Malicious Yenta - free of charge with a $100 retraction fee
Matchmaking - $50 per couple (double for nerds)
Neckties - $10 Windsor / $20 Bowtie
Political Campaign Manager - $1000 per hour plus travel expenses
Political Campaign Promise Writer - $100 per promise
Political Campaign Promise Enforcer - cost plus 10%
Toilet cleaning - $25 each ($50 for failure to courtesy flush and bad aim)
Wake Up Calls - $5 each 5:00 AM Central and later ($5 each additional minute before 5:00AM)
Yenta - $5 plus unlimited hot tea
Additional services subject to negotiation and availability
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