All Good Things Must Come To An End

 My daughter’s summer camp ends today. As you read this, we will already be packed and on the road headed home. It’s been a little over two weeks since we arrived, and it has been a blur of work and sleep for me. M&M has been enjoying her last year as a pre-teen camper. Next year, she will be staying in the dorms with the teens and participating in full spectrum of camp activities which includes being escorted to the dining hall by the teen boy campers. 

To say that The Queen and I are prepared for young men to be interested in our daughter would be a gross overstatement. We know most of the boys in the church at least passingly well. Some better than others. I honestly don’t know with which boy I would be comfortable trusting my daughter (as if I have much say in the matter). 

For now, I will let next year’s worries wait until next year. I didn’t get out much this year since I was on kitchen duty again. But here are some photos of my time here. 

M&M at mealtime with some of her friends. 

Sabbath church services all dressed up. M&M is 12. The young lady next to her is 19. Can you believe it?

The camp runs on its collective stomach. The kids and staff burn a huge amount of calories while here. Very few people miss a meal here, and it’s interesting to see people ignore their special diets while at camp. 

M&M had a “cold bore” shot in the yellow. 

Happy camper. 

One of my kitchen staff companions enjoying an early morning canoe outing. 

A nearly perfect omelette. The first few each year are kinda ugly, but we hit a groove where we know how much and how long to make a decent looking folded omelette. 

The side by side omelette station gets pretty messy after slinging several dozen omelettes two at a time with a partner in crime sharing the station with you. I try to avoid the solo station as that’s where the special needs ingredients are (dairy free eggs and vegan cheese). 

Our main dishwasher. She had a lot of help from campers and staffers alike. It’s eye watering how big a mess we can make in a short amount of time. I tried to be a good coworker and rinse my utensils and cookware before leaving it stacked to run through the wash. The kids though…I’m not saying some of them were raised by bears in a barn, but they can sure see it from where they were raised. 

Our main prep and cooking area. It gets pretty tight in there with multiple butts competing for space. The stove and griddle are my main areas of operation. 

The infamous tilt skillet / steam bath. That’s our kitchen staff director doing battle with something. If you embiggen the pic, you can see the steam up around the ceiling lights. 

M&M awaiting her turn on the knee board at the lake. 

240 ounces of li’l smokies. I have no idea how many those are, but we get them up to temp and on the line for hungry folks. My second favorite breakfast item here at camp after breakfast tacos. 

Scrambled eggs but the skillet load. We crack and scramble 22 dozen eggs most days with the exception of the 5 omelette days. That’s 264 eggs that have to be cooked everyday. Those skillets get pretty heavy. It normally takes us five or six batches of eggs to cook them all. 

Lawyers, Liars and the Legal System

 

The meme has nothing to do with today's subject except maybe tangentially, but it does kick over my giggle box. That said, there is a corollary to the meme that the scales of justice can be tipped with the sufficient application of large amounts of untraceable cash or other valuable consideration. The fact that Hillary Clinton and the cast of characters in Jeffrey Epstien and Giselle Maxwell's Client List Little Black Book are still walking free is no coincidence. 

Despite the fact that I make a living dealing with lawyers and the legal system everyday, I am not a fan of either. Too much familiarity with the sausage making process to trust it fully I suppose. So, it is with no small amount of loathing and reluctance that I agreed to give a deposition in a lawsuit arising out of a claim I handled several years ago. I could have said "go pound sand" and been well within my legal rights to do so. 1) I am out of subpoena range, 2) I am no longer employed by the company I was working for at the time, 3) they nuked the bridge from orbit which means, 4) I have no incentive to play nice. 

Unfortunately for  me, I am a stand up guy at heart. So, despite the fact that I will not get so much as an "attaboy", I now get to spend my free time for the next few days preparing for my deposition (which is the mental equivalent of a colonoscopy without the benefit of anesthesia) and then spend the better part of a day on a video conference being grilled by various attorneys about events and thought processes that took place 4 to 5 years ago now just so a few insurance companies can battle it out over who should pony up a couple of million dollars. 

There's not enough Bourbon to make this little misadventure fun. Just saying. 

New Job

I made a passing reference in a recent post to having lost my job last year literally days after closing on the new to us old house. It was not a happy making experience. The reasons why I lost my job are not terribly relevant to this discussion. Having just bought a house, I really had no desire to be unemployed so shortly after obligating myself to spending an obscene amount of money over the next 30 years of my life. Suffice it to say, my former employer had a much different opinion on my continued value to the company than I did.

While they may or may not have exhibited poor judgment in their decision to send me on my way, I still know and respect most of my former colleagues there. So, I will not start flinging poo out of any sort of misguided effort to seek vengeance. I will state my personal opinion that a company that SAYS they value work/life balance should NOT terminate an employee they KNOW full well is busting their butt to stay on top of work while helping care for elderly in laws one of which had Alzheimer's.  

Call me cynical and jaded, but anyone who believes that a for profit company gives two flying flips about your work life balance needs their head examined. 

It's been over a year. I'm over it. It was painful when it happened. Unemployment sucks. I found temporary contract employment within a few months to get us off Unemployment Compensation Benefits while continuing to search for permanent employment. As a side note, staffing agencies are in business to make money and will gladly lie to your face stretch the truth in order to file a position to get paid their finders fee. I was told positions were "temp to perm" twice only to find out that such was not the case much to my dismay.

That said, as some of you who follow the blog's FaceBook page already know and the title gave away, I now have a new job. I started this morning with a new to me company. The job is nothing special or supercalifragilisticexpialidocious. I will be doing pretty much what I have been doing for the last several years for a new set of bosses. So, same stuff, different day. The pay is better which is nice. I still get to work from home at least 4 days a week. The one day a week will be to go into the office "for meetings and collaboration". It remains to be seen how things will work out. 

I am cautiously optimistic while reserving judgment. The good news is that we will have full time benefits again. I won't have to sweat missing time for work (as a contractor, you only get paid for the hours you work). That, more than anything, is what's important right now. 

2020 in Review

My Sister…The Devil wrote a 2020 retrospective post; and, not to be outdone, I decided I would take a look back as well.

As tempting as it is to declare 2020 a total loss, a glorious example of Turd Theater writ large, the sinking of the Titanic brought back to life, etc., that is not entirely fair to the actual performance of 2020 as opposed to any other arbitrary time period in history. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not looking for a repeat of 2020. I am just enough of a pessimistic realist to know that history/karma/The Great Spaghetti Monster is out there lurking in the wings waiting to say “Here, hold my beer and watch this!”

So, let’s start off with the really craptacular aspects of 2020 from the perspective of Castle Daddy Hawk.

January – Oma went on Hospice care due to her Alzheimer’s. This was really a good news / bad news situation. On the one hand, it was long overdue. On the other hand, I had to all but force it down Opa’s throat with him kicking and screaming. While I can’t say enough good about the Hospice folks and the things they were able to do for us, I really wish they could have done more for us. We were at the end of our rope by that point (which was no fault of theirs), and we should probably have pulled the trigger on that decision about 3 months earlier than we did.

February – One of our cats, Binky, was not feeling well. So, a vet appointment was arranged; and, silly me, I thought they would give him some antibiotics and send him home. Turns out he was positive for feline leukemia and anemia. The vet really didn’t even offer any other options beyond euthanizing him. He was not even 2 years old yet. So, that was a bit of a downer.

March 1 – As previously written here, March 1 dawned with Oma shuffling off her mortal coils. As expected as it was and as much of a blessing as it was, losing a loved one SUCKS no matter how you slice it.

The rest of March and into May – COVID lock downs and toilet paper hoarding. Need I say more?

Actually, I will say more. Opa, in addition to some chronic physical health issues (which he will do nothing about), has more than a few quirks. His most serious quirk, bordering on mental illness (actually I think he qualifies for full citizenship but I’m not a licensed mental health professional), is INTENSE germaphobia. One side effect of this issue is a profoundly wasteful use of paper products. Specifically, toilet paper and paper towels. He goes through about a roll of paper towels a DAY for various uses including touching anything that he thinks might have germs on it including the freshly washed dishes in the dishwasher, he tears off the first layer or two of toilet paper and flushes that down the toilet before using the next several layers of toilet paper to cover the seat (since he has to share a bathroom with others) not including the unknown amounts he uses to wipe his own bum,….you get the idea. He refuses to shower on a regular basis and instead uses baby wipes by the box full to wipe down with. So, despite repeated warnings that paper products were in short supply, it was a constant battle with him to keep the house supplied with TP and such. So, pretty much anytime we found useful paper products, we were stocking up and hiding it from him. No, I am not ashamed in the slightest for doing so.

One other side effect of Opa’s germaphobia is that he now refuses to go out in public for ANY reason because he is afraid of COVID. He refuses to go to the store, pump his own gas or pretty much anything else. He waits until the last possible minute to ask The Queen or I to get him what he needs and then acts offended when we get frustrated at him or advise him that his lack of foresight does not create an emergency on our part requiring us to change our plans. This will be revisited shortly.

April – if losing Binky was unexpected and unpleasant, waking up one Saturday morning to M&M’s beloved rabbit Taco being unexpectedly deceased was a whole new level of suck. M&M LOVED that bunny. To be honest, we all did. He was outwardly in good health, and it was a complete shock when M&M came in the kitchen sobbing uncontrollably. We all still miss him terribly.

May and June – Aside from the continued insanity of COVID restrictions, the stress of caring for and losing Oma caught up with The Queen causing her health to crash and burn. Among other issues, she developed Tinnitus which drove her absolutely mad.

July and August – DID. NOT. HAPPEN. They were the months that henceforth shall not be named nor discussed.

September – During August, Opa finally went to visit the home of my brother-in-law for an extended stay that lasted most of the month. It was a welcome break for The Queen, M&M and I (In addition to being generally stubborn and set in his ways, Opa has been having quite a bit of difficulty adjusting to life as a widower. That makes for many frustrating situations. He is, in many ways, trying to fill an Oma sized hole in his life and frequently crosses lines he should know better than to cross.). Sometime during that visit, Opa got sideways with my BIL’s wife and harsh words were said. The net result of that confrontation was that Opa, who had originally agreed to go with BIL and wife on the annual fall church festival trip and plans made by all accordingly, decided he was not going after all. He waited to tell us until less than 2 weeks before departure. He also started dropping hints, subtle and not so subtle, that he wanted us to invite him to go with us. Due to his health issues and the ongoing challenges with The Queen’s health, his going with us was simply not an option given the distance we were traveling and the limitations his physical issues put on his ability to travel. So, we managed to prep the house for him to operate solo before departure and bid him farewell while praying very hard that there would be no disasters upon our return.

October to December – more of the same more or less. I’m not going to discuss the election. I don’t even know where to start with that mess, and I’m not even sure how to sort out fact from fiction on that front. 

On the positive side of things, there is still much for which to be thankful.  

First, Oma is finally at peace and awaits God’s Kingdom. She had been gone (mentally) for at least a couple of years; however, her physical shell had deteriorated dramatically in the last six months of her life. As I mentioned earlier, it was a relief as much as it was sad to see her go. The Queen, while sad to lose her mother, has been handling the loss extremely well having had several years to get used to the idea that her mother was dying.

Second, with COVID, my company made permanent what I had been doing unofficially and unsanctioned already: working from home. It started with the company sending everyone to work from home in mid-March. Due to the year’s financial challenges, the company decided to radically reduce its real estate footprint. To that end, all small to medium sized offices in the company were closed including the one to which I was assigned. So now, not only do I get to officially work from home permanently, the company is picking up the tab for my internet too. That’s a nice little benefit.

Third, as suggested by the second, I’m still gainfully employed and didn’t have to miss any work because of COVID. That’s not nothing. The company was strong enough to finalize an acquisition of another similarly sized company too. So, while we missed some financial targets and there was a voluntary separation program offered to those above 55 and with at least 5 years with the company, the company should be around for a while yet.

Despite all the challenges with supply chains and hoarding, we were blessed to never miss out on any necessities. I will count that as a win.

Summing things up, 2020 could have been much better and could have been a lot worse. For 2021, The Queen and I are trying to finalize and implement some long discussed plans which have been on the back burner for far too long. Further updates as events warrant.

An Insider's Guide To Claims Adjusting - Crazy Stuff

My best friend, Number One Follower, made the comment not too long ago that it would be good blog fodder to write about some of the more interesting things I deal with on a regular basis as a claims adjuster. Coincidentally, the company I work for (that has a very well known and popular ad campaign centered around..."interesting" claims) sent out a request for interesting claim stories from the casualty claims organization (think bodily injury as opposed to homeowner property claims) for consideration to be included in the ad campaign. There were several restrictions on things you could submit: Nothing involving severe bodily injury or death, it had to be "safe for work", etc.

After a 20 plus year career of handling high exposure and litigated third party liability claims, I've seen a lot of crazy stuff. When I stepped back and thought about the "interesting" claims I've handled, all of them would have been rejected for one reason or another. So, I'll just have to inflict some of that stuff on you poor souls here rather than have the glory of my claims being immortalized in a TV commercial.

How crazy is crazy you ask?

Well, let's start with the photos. The vast majority of claims files have photos in them. Most are pretty mundane....dented bumpers, wet floor signs and the like. But, some photos....hoooweeee...wow. They'd give a normal person nightmares. And, no, before you ask, I'm not going to post copies of them here...my mother reads this blog and I don't keep copies if I don't have to.

Back in the day, when dinosaurs roamed the earth and adjusters had actual paper files, we would get snail mail delivered to our desks. Depending on when the clerical staff got to your desk, it was better than even odds that you'd get your mail after lunch. Even if you did get your mail before lunch, chances were that you wouldn't get to it until after lunch.

Let me tell you...nothing quite makes the hair on the back of intestines stand up like dead body photos after a tasty lunch of pasta or barbecue (Brigid...I'm looking forward to your commentary from the secret squirrel forensic scientist gallery).

Nowadays, everyone has an electronic claims file and mail magically appears in your file after being scanned by some faceless clerical worker in another city (sometimes another country). Those documents show up sans description at all hours of the day and night. You have to go in and look at and label each one. One minute, you're looking at dry medical reports, and the next minute you're getting an eyeful of some guy's scrotum or some dearly departed's autopsy photos. Sometimes those are one and the same. 

Like I said, it'll get your attention. You don't last long in this business unless you develop a thick skin and a strong stomach.

So, what are some of the crazy photos I've seen?

The all time winner for "brain bleach" craziest photo award goes to the autopsy photo of the "gentleman" (and I'm using that term as loosely as possible in this case) who died in an auto accident. What made his autopsy photos unforgettable was his tattoo. Specifically, the location and subject matter of his tattoo. This grade A specimen of masculinity had tattooed his manhood to look like a candy cane.

Let that sink in for a moment. To this day, I am convinced he was a child molester.

Runner up for the "brain bleach" award was the scorching hot hoohah claim. Seems a lady was getting ready for her day; and, as many women are inclined to do, she flipped her freshly washed locks of hair in front of her body so she could blow dry her hair from the bottom up. Allegedly, her hair dryer suddenly turned into a flame thrower and she inflicted second degree burns upon her nether regions. Her attorney felt the need to send me unsolicited photos of her injuries. Call me a sexist pig if you wish, but she was not that attractive before she received second degree burns to her naughty bits.

The winner of the "how in the hell did that happen" award goes to the drunk driver who managed to incinerate himself and 2 of 3 closest friends while motoring down 410 in San Antonio (contestant number 4 got launched out of the pickup bed and died of blunt force trauma after he failed to learn how to fly before impacting the road about 100 yards away from the crash site), in a construction zone, at speeds in excess of 90 miles per hour. Apparently, a solid concrete construction barrier, in a clear attempt to commit suicide by drunk driver, jumped into the right lane of traffic when our intrepid Mario failed to zig when he was zagging. For the record, Dodge pickups will burst into flames when they are split in half down the middle of the engine block.

What made this claim a puzzler was the photos of the engine compartment. The fact that the engine block was severely damaged was not nearly as surprising as the charred leg that was nestled in amongst the remains of the heater hoses and other assorted engine components. What was even more surprising was that the leg was still attached to its owner who was still in the cab of the pickup. Somehow, superman had managed to put his foot and leg through the firewall of the truck into the engine compartment. We never did figure out how that happened exactly.

Most of the other photos that have found a permanent home in my memory are pretty gruesome. I'll save those memories for a dedicated gruesome post.

Crazy doesn't always come in the form of photos though.

Once upon a time, I had a copy of the driving record of a drunk that was pretty interesting. He had six DWIs in a pretty short period of time. What made it remarkable was the two DWIs in 1 day. We actually called him to clarify that one expecting it to be a mistake. Nope. He was arrested shortly after midnight for number 1, bailed out in the morning, got soused again and was arrested again before midnight.

To borrow Ron White's famous line: You can't fix stupid.

Deposition testimony is generally pretty boring. Every once in a great while, things get a little...um...racy. Once upon a time, I handled a car wreck claim involving a woman making claim for TMJ (temporomandibular joint disorder). Basically, she hurt her jaw. I'm not sure how since we never found bite marks on the steering wheel, but what do I know? Any way, the reason this claim earned a place in long term storage was the derivative claim for loss of consortium (the fancy legal term for loss of "family relationship") made by her husband.

When my defense attorney took her deposition, he asked her about the claim for loss of consortium. Now, loss of consortium generally, but not always, refers to the loss of intimacy between a married couple. So, in response to my attorney's question about how the accident and her injuries affected her marriage, the plaintiff testified that she could no longer "...give her husband [oral sex]...."

Her husband later showed up at my office, and he had to be escorted from the premises by the local police department after he exhibited some uncouth, demanding behavior.

That's all for now. More to follow as time and memory allows.

First Assignment and You Can't Make This Stuff Up

Well, the new business is off the a decent start considering I've only been operational for less than two weeks. Yesterday, I got good news that I was being added to the vendor list for a former employer who, oddly, has lots of claims in Texas but no staff to speak of in the state. Then, today, I received my first assignment from a law firm in Houston to do some accident scene investigation work in the Dallas Fort Worth area. So, YAY ME!!!

Happy dance will ensue when the invoice is paid and the check clears the bank. 

In other news of the weird and unusual, we have this bit of news. 

I wish I could have seen that claim file because I am betting the statements of the renters are priceless. The thing I cannot understand is why it took the respective carriers so long to come to a resolution. 

New Venture

Well, it's been an interesting week so far.

It started off a week ago today. Mid afternoon, I get a meeting invite from the boss' boss entitled "Discussion". Just me and him. Set for 9:00 AM Friday. Location: the HR conference room. Insert ominous music here. Whichever one floats your boat. The JAWS theme works for me.

I accepted the invite (like I had much of a choice) and went in search of the boss. I asked the boss lady if she has any clue what the meeting is about. She professed blissful ignorance of any meeting or the reasons for same. In hindsight, I think she should be nominated for an acting award, because there is no way she could not have known what was coming next. But, I'm getting ahead of myself.

I start to freak out a little. I've seen this movie before, and it doesn't end well for our hero.

I corner the boss lady's boss at the end the day and innocently inquire if, perhaps, I should prepare anything for our morning meeting and if he might share the topic of said meeting. He somewhat mournfully declined to offer any clues.

Now, our hero, yours truly, has been hard at work, flogging the other wage slaves to achieve impossible results. How impossible you ask? The year 2015 ended with our hard working claims adjusters blowing the legal expense budget by a significant percentage (13% if memory serves me correctly which translates into 6 figures worth of excess money flying out the door). Hard questions were asked. I analyzed the data, explained the facts of life in the heartless world of litigation and pleaded for a larger budget for 2016. My efforts were rewarded with small DECREASE in budget.

You have got to be kidding me.

To make matters worse, we get all new senior management a month into the year. Everyone is immediately on the alert as heads start rolling. Interestingly, senior management ignores my area for about 9 months. That's 9 months without any real direction or leadership from on high about what's expected. The only direction I was given was: 1) be in the files, 2) focus on early resolution, and 3) keep a close eye on the legal budget. The self same legal budget that had been cut from 2015.

Okay, let me just pull out my Mister Wizard instant miracle hat.

Through some magical confluence of of coincidences, my team manages to bring in legal expense under budget by 2.5%. That's a 15% improvement over 2015. Hip, hip, hurray. The crowd goes wild. Cheering was heard. There might have even been confetti.

Sorry. I have digressed. So, I spend all Thursday night trying to figure out why I must report to the HR conference room Friday morning. I haven't made any advances to anyone at the office (for The Queen is a jealous Queen, and I like skin attached to my body). I don't tell dirty jokes at the office. I don't do anything to run afoul of company rules and regs. Performance numbers look good. That leaves only a couple of possibilities.

Any puzzlement, I roll into the HR conference room at 9:00 AM to find boss lady's boss in the room with the home office HR person on video conference. The first words out of my mouth are: "This can't be good."

Sure enough, the net result is: "position eliminated". Nothing to do with performance, thank you for your efforts, strictly an organizational realignment, here's what we plan to do for you for severance, blah, blah, meaningless blah.

Long time readers will recall this has happened before. No, it's not any easier the second time around. I will say I am handling it better this time though. I made it to the car before I started having my own private meltdown.

That lasted for about 2 hours. During that time, I got the shock and hurt out of my system. I tried hard listen to what God was telling me. It was then that I came to the realization that the time had come to move forward with the plans that The Queen and I had been discussing for about 6 months.

Ever since we went to The Bahamas last year, we've been talking about what we can do to achieve a little more freedom to raise M&M together instead of me always having to disappear for 10+ hours a day to a commute and office. There are things we want to do together as a family, and 3 weeks of paid time off a year don't always cut it. Answer: start my own home based business.

So, effective today, I have an LLC registered with the state, a EIN with the IRS, a website, and I'm developing marketing materials and other essentials. Those of you who know me in real life will have seen the announcement on my personal FaceBook page. Details are unimportant as far as this post is concerned. Basically, it's me providing specific services relating to litigated claims. In the interest of professionalism, I won't be using this blog to plug the new business.

I already have a helper too.

He can't type worth a flip, and he generally just hangs around, sleeps, eats and leaves messes for me to clean up. But, he works cheap and keeps my neck warm.

Still Kickin'

I realize that I have neglected my little corner of the intertubes for much longer than I would like. I would like to plead something exciting...like winning the lottery or traveling to Mars.

Yeah. No such luck there.

Equal parts too busy, too tired and too couldn't get my give a care jump started with a flux capacitor attached to a lightning rod.

Sorry about that. We all go honey badger on the world every once in a while.

It's not like you've missed out on anything important.

In no particular order, here is the quick and dirty rundown on life since last we spoke.

I've made it through the first three months of the new job. It seems like it has been much longer than that. By all accounts, they like me and think I know what I am doing. That's positive since the CEO just hired a new executive for the claims operations which has everyone on pins and needles waiting for the ax(es) to fall. I am reasonable sure that my position is safe, and the general consensus among those up the food chain is that most everyone director level and below will not be directly affected. The AVP and VP level, however, is enjoying a wonderful case of heart burn right now.

My bet is that our current VP has about 3 to 6 months left with the company. There are a few others who will experience the job description discussion from "Office Space", and I foresee at least one "Don't you understand? I'm a people person." meltdown.

Whatever. As long as the paycheck clears and the fertilizer to work ratio stays reasonably bearable, I'm good for now.

No news on M&M's sister. Last we heard, it was the same song, third verse. Knowing and loathing the system as we do, we're doing our best to tune out the anxiety and live life instead of waiting by the phone for a call that may never come.

M&M continues to grow like a weed. She turns four very soon, and she is above average in height and development. She speaks clearer with a greater vocabulary than several kids months older than her that we know. The Queen has been teaching her the ABCs, writing, etc. She's even starting to read a little bit. She's super strong and healthy. She had her first round of swimming lessons over the summer and took to it like a duck. We also enrolled her in gymnastics (or "gymnasties" as she calls it) which she REALLY enjoys. She loves horses and gets her first riding lesson on Friday.

So, basically, she's growing up, and The Queen and I are both proud and sad at the same time.

Now that things have calmed down somewhat on the job and home fronts, I'm trying to noodle up a side gig to earn a little extra money. I'd love to make custom knives or guns, but those take money, equipment and skills that I lack at the moment. Custom leather work or wood working may be an option. The Queen wants me to start a small business risk management consulting firm of some sort. I think there is an opportunity there, but it doesn't speak to me the way the other ideas do.

The 2016 presidential race is shaking out about like I expected. Hillary, despite everyone admitting that she violated Federal law which should land her in jail, looks to be teflon coated and the only game in town for the Democrats. The Republicans are doing their best to run a campaign based on "The Biggest Loser". Rick Perry dropped out early which, frankly, doesn't come as a surprise. He was a decent governor. Not great, but not dismal either. Scott Walker dropped out too which disappoints me a little. I get the Trump thing, but I really hope he decides he has better things to do and throws his support behind a more "legitimate" candidate. Ben Carson is polling well right now, but I'm not sure if he has the backing to be there at the end. I'd really like to see Ted Cruz doing better in the polls, but don't count him out yet.

Then there's Jeb. The media seems to have already decided he's "the guy". He's the safe candidate for the Republican establishment which means he's too moderate for my tastes. Putting him up against Hillary is going to see the Repub's chances of winning the election go down faster than torpedoes at Pearl Harbor.

Needless to say, my outlook for the future is not rosy right now.

So, in order to leave you on a positive note, here are some recent pictures of the Cutest Little Girl in the World.

This is the wallpaper on my office computer desk top right now. I had been waiting a long time to get a photo like this one, and it finally happened a few months ago.

She's so cute when she is being a "proper lady".

A few M&M and Daddy Hawk pics. I love my time with her.

Did I mention she LOVES horses. This horse's name is "Death Wish" (no, really, but he also goes by Killer). She sat up on him and rode him bareback like a boss (with Killer's owner and trainer close by).

I think the respective looks says it all. The kitten wants down NOW, and M&M is giving me the innocent "can I keep him" look.

That's all for now. I've got work to do.

I Thought It Was Funny

It's been a while, but I'm still here. I've just had lots going on. I promise to write an everything update soon. In the meantime, here's a little slice of workplace humor from earlier this week.

So, my supervisor puts a note in the file:

“Put monkey on back of [the attorney] or [the claimant] to get us [the property damage] info or else we close [the file] in 7 days.”

My response in the file notes:

“Monkey installed on [claimant attorney’s] back. Monkey not happy being so close to an attorney.“

They really should install a snark filter on the claims system. 

Insider's Guide to Claims Adjusting for Outsiders

Patience is a virtue.

Look. We get it. You just had an accident. Your upset, frustrated and maybe a little hacked off. You want your car fixed, your medical bills paid and you don't want hassles.

Calling your adjuster's phone line once (or more) every minute, for several minutes is NOT going to help matters.

Your typical claims adjuster is trying to work upwards of 150 claims at any given time. Though, one adjuster I spoke with at a major personal auto carrier said their average pending was up around 260 active claims. Of that number, a typical adjuster is getting anywhere from 5 to 10 new claims a week. More if there has been a severe storm of any variety recently because people apparently lose the ability to drive when faced with a small glob of spit on the road much less a massive thunderstorm.

If an adjuster is particularly good at time management, works efficiently, types VERY fast, etc....they might get to work, really work, 20 existing files a day. Working a file means being able to put quality thought, analysis and documentation which takes a minimum of 15 minutes per file per touch. When you parse that out to a typical workload over a business day/week/month, it means that, at best and on average, a good adjuster is going to be able to touch your claim once every 7 business days.

New claims take up a lot more time because of contact requirements, recorded statements, assigning appraisals, etc. New claims take away from the time an adjuster has to devote to existing files. A new claim can take anywhere from a half hour to an hour to get off to a good start if an adjuster is lucky enough to get a hold of everyone on the first call, doesn't get interrupted, etc.

That doesn't count working incoming mail, email, voicemail messages, making payments, presenting claims at round tables, being out of the office for business/vacation/illness, etc. which all takes time.

Being out of the office is a nightmare at best for an adjuster when the time off/out is planned. It usually takes about a week to recover from being out of the office for 1 planned day. Unplanned days off are worse. It's like throwing a bomb at your diary screwing up every bit of carefully planned out and prioritized work.

We do not get some perverse joy out of making you wait. We want your file closed as much as you do. Probably more so so we don't have to deal with your cranky, impatient butt anymore. Contrary to popular belief, we do not get bonuses for keeping files open or denying claims or settling claims for less than they are worth. We get measured on how efficiently and timely we handle claims, if we make initial contacts within a certain time frame defined by the claims standards, whether we make payments timely, etc.

That's not to say we're not human. When we get a difficult claimant who yells at us, calls us incessantly and just generally acts like a spoiled child mid tantrum, we don't feel an overwhelming desire to bend over backwards for them.

And, yes, we have caller ID. We recognize certain phone numbers especially when we see them pop up every minute when we are in the middle of trying to help someone else. It's irritating as all get out. Knock it off. Call, leave a detailed message, and wait.

We will call you back as soon as we can.

Just a Little Something...

...for my neighbor in the cube farm, Scuba.

You're welcome.

For the rest of you, still nothing to report on the permanent job front. A price list for questionable services may be forthcoming.

Further updates as events warrant.

Oh...and Scuba, bonus points if you can identify this fictional SciFi spaceship.

Shhhhssshh...Be Vewy Vewy Quiet...

I'm hunting jobs.

Today is the five month anniversary of the lay off. I wish I could say that I'm over it, but the reality is that it just stings a little less as each day passes.

I did find out some information confirming that they lied to me about the reason why. They told me they were reorganizing and eliminating my position. Well, if promoting another person from a lower tier into my position is reorganizing and eliminating, then I guess that is true. I did call my recruiter to see if heard anything, and he said they have been very tight lipped (unusually so) about the whole affair.

I suppose I shouldn't be surprised at that. I just genuinely want to know if it was something I did or failed to do that was my downfall. I mean, if I'm really that much of a screw up, I need to fix now.

Regardless, they have chosen to move on without me, and I continue to navigate the murky waters of the job market. To that end, the tale of the tape thus far is 63 to 65 job applications (depending on whether you count the two nebulous "hey, we might have something you would be interested in but it's not official yet" discussions I've had), 60 or 61 rejections, 6 in person interviews in front of flesh and blood hiring managers types, and one massive, pent up ball of stress and frustration.

The 4 or 5 positions still in the pipeline have decent potential if I can just get someone to pull the trigger and make me an offer. I have discovered that the job market has changed drastically in the last three, five and nine years since I was last actively seeking other employment. The biggest thing I've noticed is that companies are looking to bargain hunt with the salary ranges being discussed, and there are a lot more people competing for fewer jobs.

Thank you, Obamacare.

I'm not giving up. Just doing a little venting. However, I'm increasingly open to the idea of "dirty deeds done dirt cheap" as a job description and not just an AC/DC song.

Just sayin'.

That Went Well

I had my first ever on demand digital interview this morning. It was weird, but it went surprisingly smooth.

Basically, the concept is that a prospective employer wants to get you in front of a wider variety of people for consideration. So, they send you a link to a website where you can complete the interview at your convenience (6:00 AM in my case). They supply the questions,  and you get 30 seconds per question to prepare followed by 3 minutes per question to wax eloquent to your webcam.

They give you a practice question to warm up to which I thought I sounded like a bumbling moron which is being unfair to bumbling morons. They also give you helpful suggestions like dress professionally like you would for an in person interview,  look at the camera and not the screen, avoid filler words, etc.

It felt like I spent the entire time looking at the screen saying "uh, um, you know". A recruiter called me this afternoon with a follow up question and said I did really well. Her comment was that I sounded smooth as silk. I'll take that.

Next step is a phone interview with the hiring manager next week sometime which will make three interviews on the books for next week.

Wish me luck. Prayers and good vibes appreciated.

Let It Rain

After what seems an eternity of drought on the job search front, it seems that the heavens have opened up and the latter rains have arrived. So far, I've applied for over 60 positions since I was laid off in mid August. Most of those barely garnered a "thanks but no thanks" email. A precious few of those resulted in screening interviews, and one of those lead to an in person interview with a hiring manager which, unfortunately, didn't pan out because of salary range issues.

Thankfully, it appears that patience, diligence and persistence are paying off in the form of some real interviews in front of real live people as I had a second interview for one position and a first interview for another this week. I have two second interviews scheduled for next week. A connection I met in law school called me to see if I would be interested in a position, and he has forwarded my resume to the appropriate person from whom I am awaiting a call.

Then, today, I got the most interesting one yet. A request for a "digital interview". Apparently, I will log into a website, click a button and answer a standard set of questions via webcam.

That's a new twist.

Hopefully, one of these opportunities will turn into a job offer and not turn back into mice at midnight. One can hope.

I'll keep y'all updated as events warrant and time permits.

Please Enjoy The Hold Music of Your Choice

I've been working on a "Where's Waldo Been?" post in what little free time I've had lately. What do I mean by little free time? Well, for those of you who do not already know, I've officially moved from unemployed to temporarily underemployed which means getting up at obscenely early hours to commute 70+ miles one way into the heart of the DFW metroplex. It's a contract position with a possibility of going full time. If it does go full time, we're looking at a 33 to 40% pay cut not including bonuses and a couple of steps back in position.

But, it's a paycheck when I needed it most.

So, I'm putting everything I have into it so that I have a better shot of making the most of it. Some other things are in the works both short term and long term. If all goes according to plan, I should have a little more free time for writing and blogging by the end of the year.

Until then, I'll give you what I can when I can.

Tilting at Liberals 2: The Rebuttaling

Back in July, I posted about the exchange I had on Facebook with the liberal lamenting how minimum wage will not support a two bedroom apartment. There was more to the exchange. Unfortunately, I never got around to finishing posting the response to my response. So, now that I have all this glorious time on my hands, I figured it was time to get back into the swing of things and wrap up some loose ends.

First, her response:

I understand your point and agree with it as well, but I was thinking more about the people who DO have skills but are down on their luck and can't FIND work that suits their abilities. Yes, those jobs that pay minimum wage are GREAT for unskilled teens who don't need to necessarily support themselves and a family. There are a lot of elderly however who are barely existing because they can't make a decent wage, and they have no one to help them make ends meet. Even $10 an hour is hardly enough to live on and support a family with these days and there are PLENTY of jobs for SKILLED workers that only pay $9 or $10. I was referring to those companies that DON'T pay what a worker is worth, but the workers don't really have much of a choice but to work for a low wage OR starve, and many of them are barely eating as it is. I definitely didn't mean to offend you, or anyone else, [Daddy Hawk], with my post. ;)

I, myself, have skills, but am not able, at this point, with my health issues, to work enough hours to support myself. I'm hoping that the improvements I'm trying to make will allow me to begin to work soon. I'm working on a disability case until I can get my health back to that point, but I will NOT be able to exist on just disability, even.

My girls are sharing living expenses, and I hope that they do work hard to improve their skills and that they WON'T start families until they either themselves are able to support one, or until their future husbands are able to do so! Unfortunately, with my health the way it has been for so long, and with me being the ONLY parent around, and no one else really playing a role as mentor, they haven't seen the examples that many kids in the church have been exposed to, of hardworking parents with skills that help them make a good wage, usually of a Father who supports the family with HIS skills and a mother who is able to stay home and be there full time for the kids. We definitely haven't had the ideal life, but God has provided for us in spite of that. I pray He will help my girls to learn on their own what they need to know and that they will work hard and keep their health unlike myself. ;)

Now, I had originally intended to do a thorough fisking of her response. As I started drafting my response though, I discovered that there was a lot I wanted to say that didn’t fit well with a good old fashioned, beat down because her response didn’t contain enough to work with for a launching point. So, instead, I decided to just go with a detailed counter response and let fly.

[Facebook Liberal], first off, you have nothing to apologize for, and you did not offend me. I took issue with the political agenda behind the image you shared by a Washington DC based, liberal, lobbying group and expressed my opinion countering that agenda. The image is rhetoric, pure and simple, and misrepresents the issue to garner sympathy and support from people who have neither the time or interest to really understand the issue. Which is exactly how we wind up with social programs that cost more than the country can afford and don't work to boot.

Let's take a close look at the smoke and mirrors behind the image for a moment. As Mark Twain said, "There are lies, damned lies and statistics." The image says that nowhere in the US can you afford a 2 bedroom apartment working 40 hours a week earning minimum wage. 40 hours a week at $7.25 per hour for 52 weeks is $15,080 a year ($1256.66 per month). They expect you to assume that a person earning minimum wage will receive no other forms of assistance so that they have to rely solely on that meager (you know that's what they are thinking) amount of money.

No discussion of earnings would be complete without taking federal and state income tax withholding, social security or the now federally mandated health insurance requirement into account. Medicare and SSDI taxes hit your paycheck for 7.65% combined. Federal income tax withholding claiming 9 deductions is 8% according to my last paycheck. So, let’s call total withholding something between 15% and 20% for most people. One week of wages at $7.25 per hour is $290. Net take home without considering insurance is between $232.00 and $246.50. It's not a ton of money, but it will go farther than you think if you make wise choices. 

Insurance is expensive no matter how you slice it, and it has only gotten worse since Congress bent us all over a barrel with the “Affordable” Care Act. But, let’s consider reality for a moment. If you are between 16 and 25 (or 26…I forget the cut off) [which is also the demographic most likely to be earning minimum wage], you still qualify for mommy and daddy’s insurance plan. So, you reject the healthcare coverage offered by your employer (assuming you are lucky enough to have employer provided healthcare) and continue believing you are invincible because you are young and employed. The other end of the demographic scale that earns minimum wage is retirees (those 62 and older). They qualify for Medicare which is a whole other can of worms that I’m not well versed enough to open.

Next, they want you to assume that a 2 bedroom apartment is the bare minimum that someone needs to survive. Perhaps. Perhaps not. The unspoken assumption here is that they want you to visualize ONE person earning minimum wage HAS to afford a 2 bedroom apartment to house a family instead of just themselves. Otherwise, why mention a 2 bedroom at all? I think you and I can agree that a single person can get by just fine with an efficiency or even a small one bedroom apartment. That's cuts your rent needs by 30 to 50% easily. So, they obviously expect you to add kids to the mix so that you feel more sympathetic to the cause. How many? 1? 2? 10? I won't try to argue that parent(s) + 10 will fit in a one bedroom apartment, but I will say that you can make mom, dad and 2 or 3 work in a one bedroom.

Now, they expect you to believe that NOWHERE in the US can you find a 2 bedroom apartment within the budgetary means of one person earning minimum wage. How exhaustive has their study been? How many people are really affected by the problem to begin with? Many a young (or elderly) married couple quite happily share small apartments without fuss or bother. Before we sold Castle Erickson, there was a nice young couple (she was an artist and he was an engineering major) who rented a garage apartment from a neighbor for the low, low price of performing maintenance around the property as needed. I personally rented a two bedroom apartment for $425 a month that I shared with a friend. Granted that was 20 years ago, but that dump hasn't gone up that much in rent even ignoring Section 8 assistance. And that completely ignores the movement of people living in 100-200 square foot tiny houses partially or completely off the grid and mostly debt free (Google "Tiny House Movement" or Tiny Houses...fascinating concept).

Based on my own recent research, NICE 2 bedrooms are starting at about $900 a month (roughly $10,800 a year in rent) in the Collin County suburbs. No minimum wage earner in their right mind is going to rent a $900/month apartment in the 'burbs, but I bet they would rent a subsidized apartment for $500/month in the inner city where there is some public transportation.

To quote someone else smarter than me whose name I forget, "You can have your own opinions, but you cannot have you own facts". In my humble opinion, I think we can safely state that their argument is a factually unsupported opinion covered in bovine excrement.

Now that I’ve gotten that out of my system, I can go to town fisking the comments the liberal did make. Liberal in italics. Me in Bold.

I understand your point and agree with it as well,

No, not really. If you understood and agreed, I wouldn’t have to fisk the rest of your comments.

but I was thinking more about the people who DO have skills but are down on their luck

Luck has nothing to do with staying employed. Making wise choices and working hard are the keys to success. Getting a degree in medieval French poetry is not likely to lead to a successful, well paying career. Sitting on your ass checking Facebook every five minutes won’t do it for you either no matter how wisely you chose your career path. Being valuable to an employer by having education, skills and experience that benefit an employer’s bottom line will result in an employer looking for ways to keep you.

and can't FIND work that suits their abilities.

What exactly is this? The only job that matters to me is the one that earns a paycheck to put food on the table. If that means sweeping floors or designing airplanes, so be it. Refer back to making wise choices, if your abilities consist solely of medieval French poetry, it’s time to work on collecting some other abilities.

Yes, those jobs that pay minimum wage are GREAT for unskilled teens who don't need to necessarily support themselves and a family.

Minimum wage serves no other purpose than to be an arbitrary value for unskilled labor.

There are a lot of elderly however who are barely existing because they can't make a decent wage, and they have no one to help them make ends meet.

What choices did they make to put them in that position? I know people just like this; and, as harsh as it sounds, they did it to themselves. It is not my responsibility (unless they are family) to be the backstop for their poor retirement planning.

Even $10 an hour is hardly enough to live on and support a family with these days and there are PLENTY of jobs for SKILLED workers that only pay $9 or $10.

Choices, choices, choices. You are responsible for the choices you make. If you are making only $10 an hour, why are you starting a family? As for the jobs for skilled workers paying $9 or $10 an hour, you need to back that up with examples. I’ve been in the job market for a month now, and the only jobs I have seen earning $10 an hour or less are entry level and unskilled positions. Don’t like the pay, change industries. Entry level insurance claims adjusting positions pay significantly better than $10 an hour, and they will train you.

I was referring to those companies that DON'T pay what a worker is worth,

A worker’s worth is measured by the value he or she brings to the company. Having said that, every position in any company (from CEO down to the janitor) has an economic tipping point at which it is more cost effective to automate, outsource, downsize or otherwise replace an employee who no longer brings a positive value to the company. Fast food workers are in danger of pricing themselves out of a market right now. You can go into a fast food restaurant now, step up to a kiosk, select your own meal, and pay for your meal without interacting with a human until the food preparer hands it to you. I have experienced that myself at a couple of different chains so far, and more will follow suit. Food prep can be automated as well.

but the workers don't really have much of a choice but to work for a low wage OR starve, and many of them are barely eating as it is.

There’s that choices thing again. Everyone has a choice. The number of options you have to choose from depend entirely on your prior choices. Choose wisely.

I definitely didn't mean to offend you, or anyone else, [Daddy Hawk], with my post. ;)

Probably not…you just didn’t think before you blindly posted something ridiculous.

I, myself, have skills, but am not able, at this point, with my health issues, to work enough hours to support myself.

I understand having health issues after taking care of The Queen for the last 8 years or so. I also understand that health issues are often the result of poor choices. It’s not my place to judge your choices, but I can say it might be worthwhile to examine the choices that got you to this point.

I'm hoping that the improvements I'm trying to make will allow me to begin to work soon.

Improvement is good.

I'm working on a disability case until I can get my health back to that point, but I will NOT be able to exist on just disability, even.

It would seem you are existing just fine since you just got married.

My girls are sharing living expenses, and I hope that they do work hard to improve their skills and that they WON'T start families until they either themselves are able to support one, or until their future husbands are able to do so!

Hope doesn’t pay the bills. Teaching your kids the value of hard work and wise choices both through example and daily interaction will reinforce the values you want to instill better than anything else.

Unfortunately, with my health the way it has been for so long, and with me being the ONLY parent around, and no one else really playing a role as mentor, they haven't seen the examples that many kids in the church have been exposed to, of hardworking parents with skills that help them make a good wage, usually of a Father who supports the family with HIS skills and a mother who is able to stay home and be there full time for the kids.

This sounds like an excuse instead of taking responsibility for poor choices. So, where is their father? Whose choice was it to have kids with a deadbeat dad? You have mentors aplenty in the church to steer your kids towards if you will take the time to build those relationships.

We definitely haven't had the ideal life, but God has provided for us in spite of that.

God is merciful that way, but He also likes to see a little initiative and effort on our part.

I pray He will help my girls to learn on their own what they need to know and that they will work hard and keep their health unlike myself. ;)

For them to learn on their own???? Are you blind? How did that work out for you? God put YOU here to teach them and be their example not to let them learn everything the hard way.