National Day of Prayer

As The Preacher here at Preachers and Horse Thieves, a certain news item caught my attention this week as I was out and about in search of evening entertainment options for The Queen and I at the nearest Blockbuster. As is my normal practice while in the car by my lonesome, I had the radio tuned to an AM talk station. At that particular hour, I was expecting to hear Dennis Miller’s radio show (whose talent I have enjoyed since his Saturday Night Live days). He generally has a very balanced, moderate view of things which I find refreshing in the current culture of extremism I see on both sides of the political landscape.

Unfortunately for me, I tuned in to discover that my local station that carries Dennis Miller had recently made the decision to insert an hour of the Jay Sekulow Live show in front of Miller’s show effectively preventing me from hearing my expected Miller fix. For those not familiar, Jay Sekulow is a lawyer with the American Center for Law and Justice (the ACLJ). The ACLJ is sort of like the anti-ACLU. It’s an organization that tries to stand up for religious rights (most notably the rights of Christians) as opposed to attempting to tear them down (which is what you normally see the ACLU attempting to do).

Now, I have nothing against Mr. Sekulow (other than the fact that he’s a lawyer). I’ve listened to him before. I was just expecting something else. You know how it is. You go to the freezer expecting to get the last bowl of Blue Bell cookies and cream only to find that [fill in the blank of the evil, despicable ice cream thief here] beat you to it and left you with the Blue Bunny frozen yogurt. Bleh. I wanted my Dennis Miller, and all I got was Jay Sekulow. Talk about being unfulfilled.

Again, I have nothing against Mr. Sekulow. He is passionate about his work and his beliefs, but it’s hard not to listen to him and not think that the gates of hell (or the ACLU) are prevailing against Christians everywhere. Nevertheless, I think he does a good job of making the legal issues understandable to folks who don’t spend their lives steeped in the esoteric world of litigation.

Anyway, I told you that to tell you this. Mr. Sekulow was on a rant about a court challenge to the National Day of Prayer. Apparently, there is a fight going on right now about whether or not there should be such a thing as a National Day of Prayer. A group called the Freedom From Religion Foundation along with a few individual plaintiffs filed suit in Federal Court in Wisconsin over the constitutionality of the National Day of Prayer.

First, a bit of history. I’ve done this to you before. You knew it was coming. Just relax, and I promise not to make it too painful.

The NDP (you’ll have to pardon me if I’m gettin’ a little tired of writin’ National Day of Prayer over and over again) is a law passed by Congress and enacted by Harry S. Truman in 1952 following an evangelical campaign by Billy Graham in Washington including a speech on the steps of the Capital building. For those legal minded individuals, you can find the text of the law by searching 36 U.S.C. 119 (don’t worry…I’ll save you the trouble and give it to you in a minute).

Well, if this isn’t right up the alley of Preachers and Horse Thieves, I don’t know what is. You’ve got your preachers and your horse thieves all wrapped up into one issue. How could I not write on this subject?

The 1952 law is not without precedent. Both presidents Washington and Adams issued proclamations setting aside an NDP. Lincoln called for “national humiliation, prayer and fasting” during the Civil War. By 1952, America had been through 2 world wars as well as several more or less major wars, was in the middle of fighting the Korean War, was up to its neck in the Cold War with Russia and was dealing with Senator Joseph McCarthy’s efforts to ferret out Communist influence and espionage in America. Under this back drop, Billy Graham’s speech called for an NDP to avoid the possibility of “national shipwreck and ruin.” Congress wasted no time passing a law requiring the President to proclaim an NDP.

As promised, here is the original language of the law passed in 1952:

The President shall set aside and proclaim a suitable day each year, other than a Sunday, as a National Day of Prayer, on which the people of The United States may turn to God in prayer and meditation at churches, in groups, and as individuals.

The language of the law underwent a minor revision in 1988 for the purposes of setting aside a specific day to allow people to plan ahead a little easier. Here is the revised language:

The President shall issue each year a proclamation designating the first Thursday in May as a National Day of Prayer on which the people of the United States may turn to God in prayer and meditation at churches, in groups, and as individuals.

At first blush, the language of the law appears to be fairly benign. However, take a moment to compare the language of section 119 with the language of section 118 which establishes the National Aviation Day. Here is the language for section 118:

The President may issue each year a proclamation—
(1) designating August 19 as National Aviation Day;
(2) calling on United States Government officials to display the flag of the United States on all Government buildings on National Aviation Day; and
(3) inviting the people of the United States to observe National Aviation Day with appropriate exercises to further stimulate interest in aviation in the United States.

I know this is one of my world famous subtle distinctions, but do you see where it says “may” in section 118 and says “shall” in section 119? If you spend any time in the litigation world, you will quickly discover that there is a world of difference between “may” and “shall”. “May” means something is permitted but not required. There is an element of discretion provided for in the term “may”. “Shall” means you will do this without fail. There is no discretion allowed for in “shall”.

Coming back to our controversy de jour, the Wisconsin Federal Court suit filed by Freedom From Religion Foundation is based on the wording of the NDP statute allegedly violating the U.S. Constitution’s First Amendment. Hold on, hold on. You should know me better than that by now.
Here’s the language of the First Amendment:

Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.

First, let’s get a couple of minor quibbles out of the way.

The main plaintiff in this suit is the Freedom From Religion Foundation. When people think of the First Amendment, they generally think that it guarantees freedom OF religion since that’s what a majority of us were taught in school. While the language of the amendment does not say those words exactly, the concept is there in the form of a prohibition on infringing the right to freely exercise one’s religion (or lack thereof). The government cannot establish one particular faith, sect or religion as THE national religion. The government cannot stop you, me or anyone else from practicing our religion or not practicing a religion if that floats your boat. I would like to take this opportunity to point out to the plaintiffs in this suit that the language of the First Amendment in no way states nor can be construed to mean that the Constitution provides for freedom FROM religion. I know those seem like minor points, but they are apparently major ones to some people.

Next, some people (previously myself included) might try to argue that the First Amendment only applies to Congress on not the President or the government as a whole. The opinion written by Federal District Court Judge Barbara Crabb (no, I did not make that up) succinctly sums up the precedent and case law settling the issue that it most certainly does apply to the President and the rest of the gub’ment. Judge Crabb’s opinion is an interesting read if somewhat long at 66 pages. You can read it here if you want to know what she really said instead of what Fox or CNN says she said. In short, she finds the NDP to be unconstitutional.

Now, I suspect that some of my readers might expect me to be vehemently opposed to Judge Crabb’s opinion. Those readers would be wrong.

Yes, you read that right. The Preacher here at Preachers and Horse Thieves agrees with a Federal Court Judge in Wisconsin that the NDP statute violates the Establishment Clause of the First Amendment. What next? Sheep and wolves living together in harmony? Don’t bet on it in this lifetime.

Here’s my reasoning. Prayer is the main means by which most people commune with their god. If you subscribe to the Holy Bible as your spiritual instruction book, you are strongly encouraged (some would say commanded) by God to pray daily. Prayer is a natural and essential part of a religious life. Now we have Congress passing a law requiring the President to set aside a specific day as a day of prayer. Being the President, he represents all Americans, religious and non-religious alike. The President is also, whether we like him or not, an individual with his (or eventually, someday, her) own beliefs or lack thereof. Assume for the moment that Americans elect an atheist. Some would argue that we already have…several times (and, no, I will not engage in a discussion about whether or not President Obama is a Muslim). Congress has passed a law prohibiting said presidential atheist from freely exercising his lack of religious beliefs by requiring (remember, the statute says “shall” not “may”) him (or her) to proclaim a day of prayer.

Secondary to that, I do not need nor do I want my government telling me how or when to practice my religion. That’s why I have a Bible. That’s why I attend a church which teaches what I believe to be The Truth (your experience may vary). I don’t need President Obama, or Congress, or anyone else telling me that the first Thursday in May is a really good day to pray. What’s next? Is the government going to pass a law saying that being Catholic or Mormon is a really good religion (no offense intended towards Catholics or Mormons)?

As a strict constitutionalist and small government conservative, I don’t think the government has any business proclaiming a day of prayer anymore than they have any business declaring National Aviation Day. It’s just not their job. They have more important things to do. The more time they spend on silly proclamations or other non-sense; the less time they have to devote to more important matters like staying the hell out of our healthcare.

Then there’s the non-conformist in me. Telling me it’s a National Day of Prayer makes me want to NOT pray tomorrow out of spite.

The bottom line for me is that my faith is just that: mine. I’ll practice it how and when I please. I’m not here to tell you how to practice yours. I may make the occasional observation to give you something to think about; but, if you disagree with me, that’s fine. You are welcome to your sincerely held beliefs. I only ask the same courtesy in return.

Magazine Titles for The Rest of Us

****Warning - Today's content may not be suitable for young children or prudes. THIS MEANS YOU MOM.****

The Queen has been having uncharacteristically normal days yesterday and the day before. I had to run some errands each evening for the good of the household, and her royal highness decided she was up for making a break from the confines of the castle keep where she spends most of her time. This, in itself, is noteworthy as she has more often than not declined such offers of late.

Nevertheless, we enjoyed a couple of evenings together of almost normal wedded bliss doing nothing more exciting than running mundane errands. Our conversation, as it is want to do when I’ve been fed but deprived of a full night’s sleep, took a turn for the odd and unusual but vaguely amusing. At least, it made The Queen laugh which means it was at least amusing to her. I must confess to a giggle or two myself. I might have even smiled. It’s been known to happen on occasion.

The genesis of our departure from composure was my recollection of a magazine article I read while at mediation on Monday. The mediation was winding down, and I didn’t want to get into a new file (this mediator is smart enough to have a hard wired and wireless internet connection for lowly adjusters such as myself whose company’s IT departments do not trust us to change the settings on our laptops). So, I started flippin’ through the mediator’s selection of magazines. I’m not terribly interested the Sports Illustrated Swim Suit issue since they didn’t see fit to have The Queen as their model. Texas Lawyer is something no self respecting person should be forced to read. I’m not into yachts. So, Yachting magazine was out. Fortune magazine is just depressing in this economy. That left me with a magazine called Dwell.

For those who are not familiar, Dwell is a magazine about homes and interior design. From what I can tell, it’s mostly about more modern architecture and interior design. Some of it looks kind of neat. Some of it looks painfully uncomfortable. A lot of it looks like they are going to have a hard time selling it. To each their own I suppose.

Anyway, The Queen commented that Dwell was a funny name for a magazine to which I agreed. Then we started coming up with one word names for other magazines. It turns out that these names sound dirty, but aren’t. No, really. They’re not. Get your mind out of the gutter.

The first one we came up with was FONDLE. You have to pause before you say it and say it quickly and dramatically with a sidelong glance to get the full effect. We originally thought this would be a great title for a magazine about poetry, but that really didn’t make sense. So, now it’s Fondle: A Touching Magazine for Massage Therapists. Now that I think about it some more, we could also name it Fondle & Stroke. It breaks the one word rule, but I’ve seen some odd two word combinations lately too (Garden & Gun comes to mind).

Then there was SCREW (or SCREWED). A magazine for the metal fastener industry.

BONER was up next. It’s the journal of paleontologists.

And we can’t leave out SUCK IT! (also breaking the one word rule). The magazine for the plastic straw industry. Picture this.

Person 1: Whatcha readin’?
Person 2: SUCK IT!
Person 1: Well, there’s no reason to be rude.
Person 2: No, seriously. SUCK IT!
Person 1: Do you have Tourette’s or something?
Person 2: Are you mental? I’m reading SUCK IT!
Person 1: I’m mental? You wanna take this outside little man?

I want to publish one issue just to see how many fights get started. Is there something wrong with that?

Fortunately, I slept really well last night. I actually went to bed before 11:00 PM. My goal was 9:00, but The Queen wanted to go to Barnes & Noble (oh, darn) from which there is no escape. Unfortunately, this means I can’t remember any other amusing magazine titles we created at the moment. I think there was a German magazine called SCHITT, but I can’t remember what that one was about.

Midlife Crisis Wish List Update

So, yesterday, mom and I were going to meet for a late lunch/early dinner at a shopping center near where The Queen and I reside. Mom suggested the location as she needed to locate and purchase a new top to wear for a concert. Mom E., for those who are wondering, is a tremendously gifted musician (she has a masters degree in piano performance from SMU), and her current day job is the chorale director and professor of music theory (among other duties) at a small college. As such, she would be the one directing for her students at said concert.

I was under the impression that we would eat first and do any necessary shopping duties afterward. I was apparently mistaken as mom forced me to assist her in her efforts to locate the above mentioned top prior to allowing me to satiate my substantial hunger. In fairness to me, I had been working hard all day up to that point and had only had a bowl of yogurt and granola to tide me over since awakening (By the time we got to a restaurant after 5:00, I was ready to chew an arm off). In fairness to mom, she did point out that some of the stores might have closed by the time we finished eating since it was Sunday after 4:00 when we got to the shopping center.

Add to this the fact that, as some might recall, I have an aversion to clothes shopping in general and women's clothing in particular (especially when the one doing the shopping is the same person who taught me to speak "Thingie"). To say that my heart was not in it is yet another understatement of colossal proportions. It didn't help matters one bit that I spent a few minutes in the firearms section of Dick's Sporting Goods while waiting for mom to get to the shopping center. It was there that I came across a rifle that I didn't recognize.





It turns out that this little gem is the Savage Mark II BVT (which apparently stands for bull/varmint barrel with a thumb hole stock) in .22LR (they have it in .17HMR as well, but I'm not interested in that little varmint nose pickin' round). Of course I couldn't resist asking to fondle...I mean hold it for a few minutes. The stock on the one at Dick's appeared to have a darker finish than the one pictured above. It's satiny smooth, and it has the heft of a bigger rifle (as opposed to my Marlin 60 which I can shoot relatively accurately, pistol style, with one hand at arm's length). It's real comfy for my monkey man arms, and Dick's was even kind enough to put a scope on it as part of a package deal. To top it all off, they've got it on clearance for $329.99 which is a steal when you consider that the best price I found online was $339.00 WITHOUT the scope (and the little detail of shipping, handling and FFL transfer fees).

The Mark II is a bolt action instead of the increasingly more common semi-automatic. Now that I think about some, I'm seriously considering dropping the Ruger 10/22 from the wish list in favor of the Mark II. I already have a semi-auto .22 in the Marlin 60. The Marlin is plenty accurate for plinking and "shoot it as fast as you can" noise making. It was never designed as nor intended to be a serious tack driver. While the Ruger would be an improvement over the Marlin in terms of accuracy, but a bolt action would be a bigger improvement. Since I am more interested in improving my accuracy skills right now, the Savage is going to the top of the wish list

Did I mention the fact that it's all kinds of pretty?

Yeah, I want it. I want it real bad.

Returning The Favor - Part 3

Well, my faithful readers, I am happy to report that yesterday's post succeeded in baiting the GunDiva into opening her prize. I told you I was good at this didn't I? You can read her initial reaction in the comments on yesterday's post.

You've got to love it when a plan comes together.

Alright, alright, alright already. I've tormented you all long enough. Maybe. It's not like the surprise is going to be anything earth shattering. Especially for those of you who weren't on the receiving end. In fact, most of you will probably roll your eyes and say "That's it?"

Drum roll, please (Visualize Ed McMahon handing the white envelope to The Amazing Carnak)...

The surprise was that I sent TWO books to GunDiva instead of just one.

Ta-da!

(cricket, cricket)

See, I told you it would be a let down. Don't say I didn't warn you.

Seriously though, there's two reasons why I went ahead and sent two books. One: That's just the kind of guy I am. I like to exceed expectations. I like to give a little extra when I can. I like to make someone's day with something completely unexpected (or a moment of shear terror if you're my mother in law). Two: I just couldn't decide on just one book to send.

GunDiva had (finally) revealed to me that she has never read science fiction and just started reading fantasy not too long ago. As a result, it was fertile ground for me to make some introductions to her reading repertoire. Since she introduced me to her favorite author who happens to write action/smut books (okay, okay...she called it a romance novel), I figured I should introduce her to a couple of my faves in the science fiction and fantasy genres.

The first book I sent was GunDiva's introduction to the SciFi genre.

If you are interested in reading the teaser summary, click on this link which will take you to Modesitt's website. I sent her this one as it was the first book of Modesitt's that I read and one that I've reread several times. It was written in 1997. If you decide to read the book, you will notice that the "bad guys" bear a striking resemblance to Mormons (Modesitt lives in Utah). However, personally, I think the book is more of an allegorical commentary on the rise of Islamic fundamentalism in the wake of Gulf War 1. Whether or not that is true, it is, at least to me, a fascinating book about faith, fanaticism, the nature of war and responsibility.

Modesitt has been one of my favorite SciFi authors since reading The Parafaith war. I've now read almost all of his SciFi novels (there are a couple that I haven't been able to find), and one of these days I'm going to have to start reading his fantasy books as well.

Next up is my favorite satirical author who happens to write in the fantasy genre, Terry Pratchett. Pratchett is a Brit whose Discworld novels are addictive. Beware...one you start reading Discworld, it is hard to stop. I have sent GunDiva the novel Night Watch which is one of my favorite Discworld novels. Again, if you'd like to read the teaser, click the link.

Pratchett's characters of phenomenal characters in every sense of the word, and I love his advice to authors which was basically (I'm paraphrasing here) be careful about the small characters you create as you may be writing about them for a long time to come. That comment was specifically in reference to a minor character called "The Death of Rats" which first appeared in the novel Reaper Man.

I sincerely hope GunDiva enjoys these two books as much as I do; however, I understand that not everyone's tastes are the same. I look forward to hearing her unbiased reviews once she has a chance to wade through them.

Returning The Favor - Part 2

I know some of you might be tuning in to find out what I sent to GunDiva in return for her bequeathing Crazy Kisses to me. I did, in fact, promise to post something today about that very subject. Unfortunately, GunDiva has not cooperated with my evil plan (yes, I do have one). She has confirmed receipt of the package, but she says she won't open it until she finishes grading some papers. Curses! Foiled again. So, some of you might have to wait a little longer than you expected (Jennifer, remember what I said in the comments about teaching you patience?).

You see, I love surprises. In particular, I love being the one to give surprises. It gives me no end of amusement to scare the living daylights out of my mother in law by sneaking up behind her and whispering "boo" in her ear. Just yesterday, I demonstrated this to great affect on the teenage daughter of a friend of ours who was here helping The Queen and I by cooking a whole mess of food. After telling the young lass what I do to my mother in law, I lurked outside the guest bathroom door when she went in for necessary business. When she came out, I jumped out and gave her a good scare. She squealed in fright, and her mother (who witnessed the stalking), The Queen (who was also witness) and I laughed hysterically.

I also enjoy employing the element of surprise in gift giving which, in the Erickson family, is an art form. One year, my sister and I chipped in to get mom a new VCR (back in the day when a 3 head VHS was the pinnacle of high tech and we were but poor high school and college students). Knowing that mother would not leave well enough alone in trying to figure out what was in the box, we devised a devious plan to thwart her efforts. The VCR box went into a much larger box that was weighted down with about 60 pounds worth of barbell weights. Needless to say, mom was clueless until she opened the box.

Sometimes the fun is in the hints. My sister and I have tormented mother on more than one occassion with subtle and not so subtle hints. One incident in particular comes to mind. My sister called me one day out of the blue and said "Guess what?". I said "You're pregnant." Of course I was right. I'm very good at guessing games. We proceeded to plot against mom. We came up with the idea to give her a little box with a stuffed rabbit inside holding some little fake lillies. Unfortunately, this hint backfired on us. Mom was puzzled by the receipt of a small box with a toy bunny holding flowers in it (she is a big fan of bunnies). It took my very astute grandmother to pointedly tell her "The rabbit DIED!" I suppose it is possible to be TOO subtle. Oh well. We had a great laugh despite the hint failure. If The Queen and I are ever blessed with a child, I will build a full blown pine coffin for the stuffed rabbit so there will be no confusion.

As you might have guessed by now, there is a surprise lurking in the package I sent to GunDiva. I promise it will be a pleasant surprise for the GunDiva, and it is not ticking or otherwise capable of bodily injury. However, I want to hear GunDiva's report of her reaction to the surprise before spoiling it here.

It shouldn't be long. I promise. Nothing encourages people to open gifts faster than to tell them there is something "special" inside.

New Paint Job

Astute and attentive readers will note that I changed the template for the blog. I suppose now that I've mentioned it, the inattentive readers will notice it too. Since I know we are all generally a conservative lot by nature (who isn't resistant to change?), why would I do such a thing?

A. Because I was bored with the old template.
B. Because the center text column was too narrow.
C. There was a butt load of wasted space on the left.
D. All of the above.
E. None of the above.
F. The voices in my head told me to, and I do almost everything they tell me to.

I may change the color scheme around again. I really liked the white on black of the old template; however, dark blue is my all time favorite color. Seriously. Half my casual clothes are in some shade of blue with a significant amount in dark blue. The first car I ever bought: midnight blue metallic. My first motorcycle: electric blue. My favorite color on The Queen: yep, you guessed it...

Returning The Favor

I just got back from putting a package in the mail to GunDiva. It should get to her by Monday. So, I won't spoil the surprise for her yet. I'll post something Tuesday to let everyone know what I sent her in response to Crazy Kisses.