Sunday, May 11, 2014

Mothers and Others

The Queen and I were up late last night enjoying movies as we typically do on Saturday night. When we finally decided to call it a night/early morning, we checked in on M&M who was snoozing peacefully in her bed. M&M apparently didn't appreciate two adults flipping the hall light on so we didn't trip and kill ourselves. She rubbed her eyes and announced, "Please turn the light off." This after she had insisted that we leave the light on when we put her to bed several hours before. 

Anykiddo, The Queen asked M&M if she wanted to sleep in mommydaddy's bed to which M&M said, "Yes...I can't sleep with Daddy." 


Mommy picked M&M up, and we all trundled off to bed. Around about 8:00 AM this morning, I figured out what M&M meant as two very small feet planted themselves firmly in the middle of my back and pushed...hard. 

I can't believe it. I was literally kicked out of bed by a two and a half year old. 

Anyway, I needed to get up anyway to sneak off to the store to get The Queen some roses for Mother's Day and some apple juice for M&M. 

That got me to thinking though about mothers. We all have one (or two or three in some cases) otherwise we wouldn't be here in the first place. But we do we ever stop and think about what makes a mother? 

A friend and former co-worker posted something on FaceBook urging people to think twice when wishing people Happy Mother's Day to those who don't have children but are "mom's" to pets. Her point was that lack of children may be a sensitive subject for the person, and saying Happy Mother's Day to a puppy mom may come across as insensitive. 

I think she has a valid point. 

Some people are blessed with children of their own. Some have to work hard to get that blessing through adoption. Some people, through circumstance or choice, are not blessed with children. Some choose to take those blessings (and non-blessings) for granted. 

Popping out a kid doesn't make you a mom anymore than not having kids doesn't make you a mom. 

Being a mom is about setting aside your own wants and desires to put the needs of a child first. Being a mom is about being there day and night. Being a mom is about being a protector and guardian to whom a child can run and feel safe. Being a mom is about being someone who will listen to what a child has to say. Being a mom is about caring enough to set boundaries and rules AND enforce them. Being a mom is about loving a child unconditionally. Being a mom is about knowing how to make the child laugh, how to comfort them when they are sick or injured, how to get them to sleep and so much more. 

I've been blessed to know several great moms in my life. Not all of them have kids of their own. The Queen was one such woman until we were blessed with M&M. The Queen was more of a mom to her charges when she was a nanny than some of her employers. My mother worked and went to school after my parents' divorce, but she was always there for My Sister...The Devil and I. We didn't always have much, but we never went without the necessities. K3 has no children of her own, but she has been the mom for several God kids whose biological mothers didn't have their heads screwed on tight.

Go give your mom, whoever that may be, a big hug and thank them for all they do for you. 


  1. Happy Mother's Day to The Queen.

    (Daddy Hawk, you are a smart man - thanks for acknowledging all types of mothers. I know several who are amazing moms who never bore children of their own.)

    1. GunDiva, to quote Forrest Gump, "I may not be a smaht man, but I know what love is."

  2. Such wise words. I too have people not know what to say on Mother's Day, and it's tough. But it's not as bad as those that say "well why didn't you have more children?". sigh. There's a tiny little grave that has the whole answer to that. Be blessed for what you have and thank you for being so thoughtful to the pains of others.

    1. Brigid, thank you for the compliment and for all you have shared in the years since I have started reading you. I do feel truly blessed for what I have; and, while I wish everyone could know that feeling the way I do, I also know that isn't always possible.


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